How shall I quit?

I would never “tip-toe” around someone, but that is no reason to piss on his leg. I know at least three people who lost prospective jobs because some former co-worker, now in a totally new company, had input in the hiring process and laid out negative reviews. (And it’s all fine to talk about sueing the person, but if their comments are based on fact, a lawsuit may be simply a costly waste of time.)

I’m with the majority here. To rehash a tired saying, the toes you step on today, may well be connected to the ass you may have to kiss tomorrow.

As much as public urination and/or interpretive dance can be an appealing way to leave your final mark, it’s going to follow you.

Now if you’re leaving, and just don’t care, I will advise the following;

  1. be the last person out on your last day, super glue all the staplers to the desks before super gluing all of the office doors shut.

  2. carefully saran wrap all of the sitting toilets.

  3. Do something amusing with paintshop, a picture of your boss and cattle, make MANY copies, hide them MANY places.

  4. Hide a fish or two in the drop ceiling.

  5. Put the caps back on all the water cooler bottles, and replace them.

  6. Hide two large shrimp in hated co-workers offices or cubes.

  7. Vaseline all of the door handles.

  8. Release a large bag of sparrows into the office (don’t ask me how to get them, I just know it worked on my last day of school)

I’ve got a million of 'em. But honestly, be decent about it, and enjoy your new job.

Take the exit interview seriously, but don’t forget that they’re not your bosses anymore. One place I quit told me they were going to take the vacation time I’d just used out of my last check. With a week yet to go, I told them I’d have to be a damned moron to come in at all during my final week if they did that. They changed their plan immediately.

I reccomending storming into your office with a good old fashioned 1920’s style “Death Ray” and showing everyone there how you really feel.