Ok, I’ve had it…I’m outta here. Without getting into the details, I’ve had it with trying to keep this sinking ship a float.
I won’t start looking until January, but then I will start looking serioulsy. When I’ve got my new job all arranged, how shall I quit this one?
At first I figured I’d just stop coming. They’d figure it out eventually. I don’t even think they have my current phone number on file, I don’t even plan on staying in this industry, so I kind of liked the idea of becoming a sort of urban legend in the company one day.
Then I figured it would be hard to get my final vacation pay, and pension pay-in if I didn’t resign properly.
So, what shall I do? Just drop a note on the boss’ desk? Schedule a meeting? A meeting with a written notice? I want to be abundantly clear that my leaving is not a threat, or a device to get a raise; when I give my notice, I’m really on the way out.
A simple letter, explaining that you’ve changed fields and have a new position should suffice. Since there are benefits which are owed to you, I’d include current address, and close on a positive, thanking them for the opportunity to be part of the team.
Once you have your money, feel free to send a note to a co- worker detailing your impression that upper management couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if they were told the instruction label was under the heel. Have that posted on employee bulletin boards. Legend status secured.
I saw a Mary-Kay kind of thing on the board the other day that offered “Free Facials”…well… I was incredibly tempted to add a tag that read something to the effect of “Free pearl necklace with every facial”.
Before you quit go in to your boss, lay out the problems, and tell him you want double your salary and more vacation. If he denies it then tell him you quit. Who knows, you might just get lucky.
Ha! If you only knew… Fuck, my boss has no idea what I do. He thinks I’m still doing the job I did when I started here 5 years ago, even though that entire department’s been closed, and I’ve been in a totally different department for the last 2 years now.
To be honest, I’m not even sure double salary would keep me here.
Have someone write “I quit” across your butt in lipstick or marker (make sure you use a dark color), and then go sit on the Xerox machine. Put a copy in your boss’s inbox. If you find xeroxing your hinquarters to be too crude, you can instead go moon your boss.
Don’t slam the door - really. I’m still running into people I worked with 20 years ago. Write a letter saying I’m resigning, thank you, and leave it at that. Have fun thinking about all the things you FEEL like doing when you quit - but don’t do any of them.
Schedual the vacation, get the pay and never go back! I used to think about the whole “don’t burn bridges” thing, but honestly, if your quitting, its because the job sucks and you won’t ever be back. I wish I had quit some shit jobs with more style. Maybe take a crap on the bosses desk!?!
Be sure to steal lots of office supplys in advance!
She told me she loved me like a brother. She was from Arkansas, hence the Joy!
Apparently crimping off a steaming log on your boss’ desk will tend to get the message across, but can be looked upon as ill mannered by some.
Seriously though, I would go with danceswithcats’ suggestion, a simple, polite letter of resignationyou never know when you might run across these people in the rest of your life, so it is best to leave with as little commotion as possible, even though you might want to go out with a bang.
Never burn bridges. Even if you hate your job and would never go back, the company is made up of people. These people often go to other companies and you will probably run into them again. These people will might be in positions of authority in companies you wish to work for in the future and you want them to think as highly of you as possible.
Oh whatever…that’s like the “permenant record” everyone supposedly has in grade school.
I say if you don’t plan to travel back over that path again, why not burn the bridges behind you? What’s the point of tip-toeing through life so as to avoid pissing off some nobody middle manager just in case, god forbid you see him again?
Don’t listen to these people who are telling you to go ahead and burn bridges. You never know when some future employer, admissions committee, or someone else is going to ask for a letter of reccomendation or a reference from this employer.
Hey, you can always find someone to write you a letter of recomendation. But that former boss will have to spend the rest of his life with the shame of you kicking the crap out of him and dumping a bucket of donkey shit on his desk.
Despite all the false bravado urging a burning of the bridges flair, I’ll have to counsel not doing so. Why create debits you don’t need? The satisfaction can be gained other ways.
When I left my first post-college career job, it was from nine years with an oil company privately held by a meglomaniac who generally ostracized, with a vengeance, anybody who managed to quit before he fired them. I became a minor legend there by writing him a letter of resignation that praised this double-dealing hard-trading son-of-a-bitch for teaching me how to steer my own boat in turbulent waters with ethical standards always being my guiding beacon.
He liked it enough that it was copied and circulated to all departments, and posted on bulletin boards. He’d never had a resignation like that, and he liked it, apparently.
Nobody who worked there could read it without recognizing that it was unadulterated cynical sarcasm through and through. Within an hour I was getting phone calls from ex-coworkers at other companies who’d now heard about it.
You know, just for the heck of it, I performed my version of my “quitting interpretive dance” for my husband, and it was quite entertaining. It did involve a lot of middle finger gesticulation, I must say, but I think it would get the point across.
I’m just about ready to quit my job, too. I’m taking a course in January that will involve me not working for four Fridays in three months - I won’t be asking for the days off, I’ll be telling them I’m taking them off. I figure that oughta take care of my quitting requirements.