There is meaning in ritual. Doing the same thing, saying the same words over and over again can give you the space to think about the words and actions rather than having to think of the words and actions. (Not saying that a person couldn’t do both - but sometimes, for me, it’s easier to contemplate when I’m not talking. Especially if other people can hear me talk.)
Sometimes, though, it can be the equivalent of small talk with a person(“Hi!” “how are you?” “fine.” “have a nice day.”). But keeping up with small talk makes it possible to have larger, deeper, more meaningful conversations later on.
When I was just a tot, we used the “God is great, God is good, Let us thank Him for this food.”. Of course, I thought we were talking to the lady on the bottle of my favorite dressing, so I was a little confused. (Green Goddess dressing…Goddess great, Goddess good…) Wasn’t till years later that I figured that one out.
My in-laws generally used some variation on the “bless us and this food” or “we give thanks for this food and our blessings” themes. The actual words depended on who was saying it and what they wanted to throw in.
That’s consistent with what I’ve generally heard said when I’ve been somewhere that Grace was spoken. Maybe some of those folks used the same words every time and I just didn’t know it, though.
Hmmm. “Godess great, Godess good. Let us thank her for our food” could work for some of my pagan friends. They may get a kick out of it. Then there’s an old, somewhat irreverent favorite of mine:
On a more serious note, this was brought up recently in an on-line community of Episcopalians and Anglicans I belong to on-line. People have said grace using all sorts of forms there, both spontaneous and traditional. For Episcopalians in America, the Book of Common Prayer has four graces. They are:
and
Of course, Lobsang, you old heathen, none of these match what you’re used to, but the Americans and English are different. You’re versions one of the ones I’m used to and I like it better than the shorter one, but I’m long-winded.
Lobsang’s The OP’s original grace (“For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful.”) is what Maria (Julie Andrews) says in “The Sound of Music”.
“Bless us O lord…” is what I grew up with and I always thought of a “Catholic Standard”
At nursery school, my daughter learned:
Thank you for the food and care,
Help us now to love and share
…which served us quite well for a long time, until we realized more than a year later that she was saying “Help a snout,” and now I can’t hear it without smiling. Its not easy to share a snout, let alone love one.
We have friends who come to dinner with their 7yr old daughter. Grace is always said, it rotates and is different each time. But the ritual is always the same. We all hold hands and then, once grace is over, we kiss the back of each of the hands we’re holding. It’s their tradition not ours, but I quite enjoy it, anyone else ever see this done?
I grew up with the same “UK standard” grace as the OP ("“For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful.”), but neither my own family nor anyone else that I knew actually said grace before meals.
On occasions when I’ve been asked to say grace myself, I usually go with the Selkirk Grace (aka Burns or Scottish grace as mentioned upthread).
The grace that has been said in my presence more times (>500) than any other is:
[“We unhappy and unworthy men do give thee most reverent thanks, Almighty God, our heavenly Father, for the victuals which thou hast bestowed on us for the sustenance of the body, at the same time beseeching Thee that we may use them soberly, modestly and gratefully. Through Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen”]
I can still come up with the whole darn thing on demand, and have been known to mumble it in my sleep…
In the same vein as “help a snout,” my best friend’s family also said the “Catholic Standard” (that’s how I think of it too), but her little sister thought it went: “Bless us, O Lord, and these thy guests,…” which, when you think about it long enough, has a slightly cannibalistic flavor to it… They were unable to make it through grace without giggling for quite a while after they realized that that’s what she was saying.
We grew up with “Bless us, O Lord” in English, and this in Spanish (which we got from my great grandma):
Bendecidnos Señor y bendecid nuestros alimentos, que debemos a vuestra infinita bondad. El Rey de la gloria eterna nos haga participar de la mesa celestial. Así sea. Amen.
Bless us O Lord, and bless our food, which we owe to your infinite goodness. May the King of eternal glory allow us to participate at the heavenly table. Amen.
We also used “Rub a dub dub…,” “God’s neat,” and, when especially smart-assy, “Grace.”
My SIL is Episcopalian; her family always used “Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest…”
My German friends hold hands after saying grace and say “Guten Appetit” (=Bon appetit!).
In response to the OP, I think any grace that is said with sincerity is acceptable.
I grew up with the kind of grace where you essentially created a new one each meal, but I now have one “grace” that I usually say. It has not lost meaning for me in the least. My heart is in it every time, even when I’m rushed.