How to cause maximum irritation for credit card companies

I am really peeved at the credit card offers I get in the mail. If one of them falls into the wrong hands it could result in identity theft, so I have to shred them. The CC companies should not have a right to take up my time and and the resources required to deal with such crap.

I started sending in the return envelopes which come with the offers, filled with leftover bathroom tiles. I believe the recipients (the credit card companies) must pay the postage on these by weight, so I’m trying to cost them as much as possible.

My question is: could I be doing more? Could I tape a postage-will-be-paid-by-addressee envelope to a brick and expect it to make its way through the postal system, ultimately to cost a CC company a few dollars?

Relevant Cecil Article

According to Cecil Adams, the postal service will discard the brick.

And the tiles.

You can “opt out” you know.

Hmmm. Next question: Could my tiles in the envelopes be considered “abuse of the mails”?

How do you know they’ll discard tiles?

Surely there’s a weight threshold where the postal service won’t throw them out.

It doesn’t take that much effort to “stick it to them”. I worked for one of the pioneer Internet billing companies a while back and thie is what I learned. It cost the biller at that time about $1.00 - $1.25 per bill just for processing remittance. We could do it for about 20-40 cents each, so they saved money doing it online. Here’s a fact we learned: If the remittance had, say, a check stapled to the bill or something of that nature, it had to be sent for special processing, which could cost more than $2.00 each on top of their existing cost and delay the crediting of the payment. They hated that.

What does that mean?

He means staple your check to the bill. I do not recommend it.

Weight is not much more than an oz, in other words, as soon as it requires extra postage. A little birdie wearing a little gold badge that said “Postal inspector” or something like that told me.:wink: Believe it or not.:stuck_out_tongue:

My BIL is a postmaster and I have asked him about using postage paid envelopes for other than the intended purpose. Most postage paid envelopes will only cover the discounted bulk first class mail rate purchased by the sender of the junk mail. If the package weighs more than one ounce, it is returned to the sender if possible, if not, it is tossed in a recycle bin. Very few folks are stupid enough to put a return address on these envelopes making any kind of prosecution difficult.

  1. remove contents of junk letter.

  2. take the return form (or whatever you’re supposed to send back), and remove all references to yourself, rendering the document anonymous.

  3. gather up a bunch of little bitty pieces of paper (looseleaf hole punchings, for example).

  4. fold the return document, then slightly unfold it a little, and evenly sprinkle the confetti into the crease. Refold paper, put it in the prepaid return envelope, seal, send.

This wouldn’t stop the junk mailers, but having confetti spill all over their lap and desk would aggravate at least one of their minions.

I’m not suggesting that anyone do this. The idea is for entertainment purposes only.


D’oh! :smack: THAT’S what I could have been doing all those years with those damned AOL discs!

Adding to this, why not start screwing with them (if you have the patience) halfway complete the forms, but send back incomplete or inaccurate info, wrong forms or whatever - let them spend money and waste time setting it right while you never quite sign on the dotted line

They have machines open the envelopes. They slit the top, then a suction thing grabs both sides and pull it open for a person to grab the contents.

I’d be a little concerned about the investigation and prosecution for the damage you could cause…

Your not irritating the sender of the junk mail at all, you are pissing off a minimum wage clearing house employee that likely doesn’t even work for the offending bank. Rather juvenile and unwarranted in my book.

It’s obvious where all that extra time they waste is accounted for. The effort you put into causing them problems is not time they wasted. :rolleyes:

Seconded. And when I think something’s juvenile? Dude, it’s way juvenile.

Heh heh. I just thought of a way to retile my bathroom for free.

Mr. Duality, you’re preapproved.

Of course this as noted delays crediting of the payment, which might result in late fees and/or interest charges, thereby hurting you more than it hurts them (if they hit you with 30 dollar late fee + interest, that’s far more than the 3-4 bucks they lose).

I’d recommend doing this only if you also pay the bill in full, online, and on time. Then mail 'em a check for a dollar.

This doesn’t address the pre-approved offers the OP mentions, however.

I’m moving this from General Questions to In My Humble Opinion.

General Questions Moderator