As someone who spent many years slightly underweight, I get where you’re coming from. I once returned from a trip to Asia, down maybe 5-7 lbs, and took heaps of abuse about being so thin. Thought I’d just put it back on with the change of diet, but a month later no luck.
I had a friend who also worked in a bar, great guy, big, roundish fellow, excellent bear hugger, good friend. I was moaning and complaining and he told me to come see him whenever I finished my shift, which I did. On his diet I drank a beer everyday almost. I’m not a drinker, he tried to push stout, but I wasn’t having that. We settled on a small draft beer, probably 5 days a week. I was choking it back too!
Within 4 wks I had gained 8 lbs! I called it the beer diet, and it worked the charm, let me tell you. And the whole universe seemed to get off my case, life was good again, though I was probably still slightly underweight by the charts. Stopped drinking the beer and kept the weight, no worries.
I was in this situation a few years back - I’d been underweight for years due to a medical condition that was finally under some control and wanted to gain some weight. I did quite a bit of research, and this is what worked for me:
The first thing I did was keep track of everything I ate for a week. From the minute I woke up until I went to bed. I wrote down the amounts - as best as I could estimate - and then calculated my caloric intake. I was surprised to find I was barely hitting 2,000 a day, even though I felt I was eating whenever I was hungry.
While trying to gain, I ate healthy, but boosted my intake to about 3,000 calories a day. I kept track of this for a week as well to get myself into the habit of eating this way. I had to force it down sometimes, but found that by munching all day and never letting myself feel hungry I could get the calories I was looking for.
To help hit that amount and get lots of protein, I drank a lot of milk as well as protein shakes. They aren’t the best tasting, but it was definitely worth it.
I was also hitting the gym while I was doing this - only two or three times a week, low reps and high resistance. The idea being that rest is just as important for gaining weight, so that I would work out and rest one or two days before heading out to the gym again.
It worked well for me - I gained about twenty pounds - mostly muscle and some fat - in about six months.
Yeah, I’ve always been in the same boat as the OP. And while we worry a lot about fat people’s feelings, it doesn’t feel that good to constantly be told “you need to eat more” either, especially considering I always used to eat more than just about anyone I knew.
I’ve sort of given up for the time being because eating all the time is too expensive now (versus, you know, the college dining hall), and I’m trying to be more cognizant about health, but what helped me gain weight was:
Eating meals quickly. Don’t ever get an appetizer and drink and pick at it slowly over 45 minutes, you’ll kill your appetite. Stuff everything all down at once.
Not skipping breakfast
Weightlifting. Actually, and I’m not sure how this works, but I gained the most weight while I was doing both a weightlifting and running program at the same time, versus just weightlifting. I always thought cardio made you LOSE weight, so YMMV.
Also, and I’m sorry to say, you have to eat when you’re not hungry. I don’t mean when you’re stuffed you have to make yourself vomit or anything like that, just that there are those times when you’re not hungry or full, and you have to pack it down during those times.
Boomer - look into “Ensure” or something similar. 350+ calories per 8oz serving and also contains a lot of vitamins and other essentials. Many of the large grocery chains carry their own version for lower cost. Adding 350 calories per day or every other day will make a difference - it did with me.
OK, for the things I forgot to mention: I’m 6 foot, about 65 kg, 30 years old, and eat at least 3 squares a day (usually quite a bit more than that - one of my RL nicknames is “fang”, due to the ridiculous amounts of food I eat). My finances don’t allow me to eat as much as I’d like to, but I certainly don’t starve.
I’ve had some very stressful things to deal with the past 5 years or so, and I don’t drive a car, so usually walk or ride a bicycle. I was doing weights until I caught pertussis and cut my hand open. I’ve put on enough weight that it’s not really a health issue now, more of a “prevention better than cure” situation. And perhaps a slight twinge of vanity.
This is not advice, but I have a friend who eats an entire box of Ferrer Rocher every night before she goes to bed. She’s thrilled now that she weighs over 100 lb.
There’s a few simple rules to follow, and it really depends upon how much effort you want to put in on how much you want to follow them.
Diet. This is pretty simple, it’s really the same sort of thing you do for losing weight, you just each more. Figure out your base metabolic rate for your goal weight, adjust for your activity level, and add a few hundred calories if you want to get there a bit faster and go with that. Focus more heavily on proteins and avoid simple sugars and starches. In general, your protein intake should be no less than 1g per pound of your goal weight or as high as 1.5g. If you’re having trouble eating enough calories, liquid calories can help a lot with things like protein shakes and such. Also, each in multiple small meals a day if possible. Finally, make sure you eat some fast digesting protein (like whey) immediately after a workout to help with muscle growth.
Exercise. Weight training is vital for building mass. Particularly for gaining weight, you’ll find higher weight, lower rep routines to be ideal for that, and you can adjust toward a more balanced program as you approach a goal weight. Cardio is important, but you’ll probably want to focus more on shorter intense cardio routines rather than longer to focus more on burning sugars and such. Particularly while trying to gain weight do NOT overtrain. Generally any more than about an hour of weight training four times a week will slow down your weight gain; however, in the hour, you should be working very intensely.
Rest. Getting sufficient quality sleep is extremely important. You build muscle during sleep, so if you’re not getting enough, you’re not maximizing your gains. Also, make sure you don’t go to bed on an empty stomach, try to have a low-carb, complex protein 30-45 minutes before going to sleep.
That’s pretty much it though. And you can always quickly adjust to improve your gains by eating a little more or adjusting your workout routines. Just don’t try to gain it too fast or you’ll just get fat instead.
Telling someone who wants to gain weight to “eat more” is about as useless as telling someone who wants to lose weight to “eat less.”
You can eat the same amount if you substitute higher calorie foods. An excellent book on the subject is Dr. David Reubens Quick Weight Gain Program.
Instead of having cereal fruit and milk for breakfast, have pancakes. Eat the same salad, but add a scoop of tuna salad and some croutons. Load up your morning coffee with cream and sugar.
I’m not understanding your objection here. She gave him some tips on HOW to eat more, rather than just saying “eat more.” That seems to be the point of her post.
