Funny. I am good friends with one couple who married during medical school (well, she was in med school and he was in law school) and I am acquainted with several other couples who all met and married during medical school. It seems to me that you can, in fact, have a very happy relationship while studying medicine.
Altering a significant aspect of yourself while undertaking intensive studies seems like a very bad idea to me. In trying to get rid of one very normal distraction, your friend might create much worse problems.
WRT do demands on their time, all med students are pretty much in the same boat. Your friend should ask the upperclassmen how they deal with their lust. Many would consider that a deeply personal and embarrassing question – but a person who can’t talk frankly about such things has no business in the medical profession.
And I do mean upperclassmen. For the women it’s not quite the same problem. It’s generally much easier for a woman to get laid without devoting a lot of time to it, if she doesn’t set her standards too high.
I’m not in Med school, but I am working on a PhD in another field full time as well as working full time. It takes an enormous amount of time, so I can’t imagine medical school taking much, if any, more. During most of the semester I found I had adequate time for a relationship I had started shortly before the most recent semester. As long as she understands the commitment he’s made to his education, that part of a relationship should be no issue, especially if she meets him WHILE he’s doing it. Its harder if she’s used to having more time with him and she then misses some of it when he goes away. During periods in the semester when I was terribly stressed between projects/finals and/or my job, stress pretty much took care of any thoughts of the sexual aspects of a relationship for me, in that I didn’t even think about it. So, I think as long as he is not obsessed with sex, he should be fine; the greater the stress, the less the interest… a perfect balance. Really, there’s no reason to take drugs or the like. If he REALLY has trouble with it, and providing he doesn’t have any moral/religious objections, what’s 5 minutes once/twice a day? If he does have objections, then he should already be used to controlling the urge.
Friend: Gosh Anise I have this HUGE problem with an overactive sex drive -PLEASE help me find a solution. Can you think of anything?
Anise: Golly yes dear horny male friend of mine! I will use all my powerful net-fu search skills to find you and answer. I’ll get on it now!
Friend: That’s…umm… great.
Ansise: I’ve got it! Marching tunes!
I love a parade,the tramping of feet,
I love every beat I hear of a drum.
I love a parade, when I hear a band
I just want to stand and cheer as they come.
That rat-a tat-tat, the blare of a horn.
That rat-a tat-tat, a bright uniform;
The sight of a drill will give me a thrill,
I thrill at the skill of everything military.
I love a parade, a handful of vets,
A line of cadets or any brigade,
For I love a parade.
Regret the following is merely a different view point.
An elderly friend went to the Dr. saying, “Doc can you do something to lower my sex drive?”
The Dr. replied, “At your age it should all be in your head!”
Reply, “That’s the problem, Doc”
Haha. Hiring a prostitute 2x a day is going to get expensive for a med student. Maybe he can offer free OBGYN exams in exchange for sex.
Nandrolone is also used by some to kill sex drive (it replaces testosterone with a weak, artificial testosterone), but it is a scheduled drug. GnRH blockers could work too. I think testicular heating also is tied into weakening the libido. There is another chemical aside from serotonin and testosterone that plays a large role in libido and I can’t remember its name. damn.
I asked Anise this question because I am completely frustrated with whatever it is that keeps me from getting laid even if I have the time needed to focus on attracting a partner. (Trust me, it’s been a long time. Yes, I’m male. No, I’m not going to visit a hooker.) Anyway, if cannot have sex to save my life, I hope I can channel my energy into my studies (and get a good specialty and make myself more attractive in the process). What I’m really interested in is learning meditative techniques that I can use to decrease desire and apply them to my sex drive.
I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but that’s what I want to know.
Otherwise, has anyone mentioned antidepressants? I really doubt meditation is going to work. The sex drive is a pretty ingrained part of who we are. Just ask many of the priests here in New Mexico.
What worked for me a bit was just self acceptance. Accept that you don’t have the time, desirability or ability to mate/meet women, probably wont over the next 10-20 years and accept that you are a whole person anyway, and the desire goes down. Supposedly demanding that life and self be different from what they are is the root of neuroticism. Self acceptance goes a long way to fighting that.
Sadly the human ancestors who were easily dismayed from the idea of trying to mate with women probably didn’t pass on their genes as much as the men who never gave up no matter the personal cost, so we are all descended from knee jerk sex hounds. It gives the phrase dirty old man a whole new level of meaning.
