How to make a time machine, some special gadgets, and do special things with them?

Factual Questions
1

This is a serious thread.

I have a few questions for everyone:

  1. How can I create a real working time machine with a modern sport wrist watch or anything else?

  2. How can I use time travel without the symptoms and side effects (de-stabilising the space-time continuum, changing history, memory loss, creating a modified timeline, creating a paradox, etc.)?

  3. How can I become my younger self while travelling through time?

  4. How can I travel through time back to a certain date without feeling like I have done anything?

  5. How can I go back to a time before the time machine was made and have things exactly they were at that time?

  6. How can I make my brain function exactly the same way it did on that date while travelling through time?

  7. How can I feel exactly the same way I did on that date while travelling through time?

  8. How can I have exactly the same thoughts I had on that date while travelling through time?

  9. How can I have exactly the same interests that I had, do and even say exactly the same things and words that I did and even said, and be in exactly the same place that I was on exactly the same time and place on that date while travelling through time?

  10. How can I travel back and/or forward in time without me being in a different timeline, universe, or even changing history, etc.?

  11. How can I create a device that speaks to me, like a person is speaking to me, without anyone actually saying anything to me, so I can get any answer I want, whether the questions that I ask are positive or negative, and whether the things I want to do or find out how to do are good or bad?

  12. How can I create a real working teleporter or teleportation device and/or teleport myself anywhere and/or to any place?

  13. How can I create a device that can make me be invisible and/or non-solid?

  14. How can I create a device (like in question 11) that can do tasks (possible and impossible) as soon as I ask, tell it to, or press a button?

  15. How can I freeze people and/or create a freeze gun?

  16. How can I get an instant reply or make someone instantly reply to me, and/or create a machine that can make me get an instant reply or make someone instantly reply to me?

  17. How can I create a device that can make me be invincible?

  18. How can I create a magic stopwatch?

  19. How can I find out when someone will reply to me and/or what someone will say to me and create a machine that will tell me when someone will reply to me and/or what someone will say to me?

etc.

I only want serious answers please.

Can you please answer my questions as soon as possible?

Triner

2

If you have a time machine, or intend to build one, there’s no need for a quick response. You have all the time in the world.

3
  1. How can I create a device that can make me be non-solid?

Buy plans and materials for a, very large, industrial blender.
(Make sure it has a dial that goes to 11.)

CMC fnord!

4

Doesn’t Siri/Alexa/Google already do this?

5
  1. How can you create a magic stopwatch?
    Ummm. Magic, of course.
    And that is my serious answer. ****
6

Here you go.

7

No, it isn’t.

8

Moderator Action

We prefer that threads in GQ be a bit more factually based. Since this is silly sci-fi at best, this is closed.