We didn’t play dodgeball, we played dodgerock.
…if you saw a cat with ears and tail intact, you knew it was a visitor.
One day, I was walking down the street when a little kid in a third floor window threw a rotten egg at me, followed by a barrage of obscenities. When I ordered the little brat to get down here, he answered, “Are you kidding? I can’t walk yet!”
On Hallowe’en they used to hand out little bottles of Tabasco sauce.
True one: My neighourhood was so tough that it was nicknamed Murder Mile 
My neighbourhood was so tough that Chuck Norris was the school weakling.
My neighbourhood was so tough, they didn’t shoot you. They inserted the bullets manually.
My neighborhood was so tough, the ice cream truck played Helter Skelter.
My neighborhood was so tough, the squirrels buried mutts.
My neighborhood was so tough, the acupuncturist used an ice pack.
I asked a child what he wanted to be when he grew up. He frowned and said without blinking, “the Boogeyman.”
This one’s true: One of the bigger supermarkets in my area carries boxed boullion cubes protected by those antitheft tags that have to be removed at checkout. Anyone else seen that?
I saw a man shot in the chest and killed 30’ from my front door when I was 7.
Saw a guy getting blown in a vacant lot by a hooker similar timeframe.
Late 70’s.
Uptown Chicago.
My neighbourhood is so tough the birds sing Stevie Ray Vaughan. Some play the saxophone.
My neighborhood is so tough, the dogs and cats wear bandannas and do drive-by poopings.
Great username, avatar and post combo!
Yeah, now we just need a pocket square.
Our schools were made of asbestos.
“Tough? Real tough. At school if you didn’t bring a gun, you could borrow one from the teacher.”
–Rodney Dangerfield