Though this might make an interesting column, this is meant to be more of a joke beginning “My neighbourhood was so tough that…”
…The street crossing sign showed a man dropping a package and running…
never mind
Hmm. We’ll try again.
My neighbourhood was so tough the Main Street was named after its chief ingredient. Jimmy Hoffa Avenue.
My neighbourhood was so tough we played tug-of-war with barbed wire.
My neighbourhood was so tough even the brakes never squealed.
My neighborhood was so tough burglars chewed through those window iron bars.
Baby rattles still had the snakes attached.
I can’t take credit for this one but it’s funny:
“My neighborhood was so tough we used to have drive-by strangulations.”
My neighborhood was so tough the mailman worked from home.
My neighborhood was so tough, at the beach we’d kick sand in our own faces.
My Hood was so tough, the Baddest Cat was Sammy Davis Jr. Junior.
My neighborhood was so tough, everyone gets stitches.
mmm
My neighbourhood is so tough, the church has bulletproof stained glass windows.
My neighborhood was so tough that pizza delivery was done in armored cars.
And mine was so tough the Baddest Cat was named Sammy’s Good Eye.
Not original:
My neighborhood was so tough the family budget included holdup money.
Our neighbourhood was so tough the teachers used to steal our lunch money.
Neighbourhood Watch used to protect us from the raccoons.
The theatre sold unpopped kernels.