Based upon life as we know it, of course. It is the unknown that could be surprising.
I think something the size of Godzilla could only exist in a world where magic was possible. And if it somehow managed to find its way here then the effects of our weapons on it might be less than what we’d expect them to be.
If it is in LA, is it closer to Compton or South Side? If it’s in Compton, paint it blue, it will be dead in an hour. Same goes for if you paint it red in South Side. If you can somehow tell the Southern Mexicans or Neustra Familia that the monster is affecting their drug trade, give it about 20 minutes.
Gamera will save us.
So no noticeable effects, then?
Actually, what would really happen: everyone stays home and watch the continual live action TV coverage via the fleet of newscopters. And then turn it off in boredom after the first hour or so.
Ha! That’s just ludicrous. In fact, there would be many urgent meetings occuring nationwide. Task forces and working groups would be convened. Draft action plans would be prepared. Countless PowerPoint presentations would be delivered. Budgets would be developed, external reviews would occur, and experts would be called in at great expense to consult. Interagency evaluations would be conducted to ensure no duplication of effort, and general counsels throughout the Federal government would vet proposed strategies to minimize risk of legal challenge. Field offices and remote sites would upgrade telecommunications capacity to ensure adequate ability to participate in round-the-clock conference calls and video meetings designed to coordinate missions. Then, the full power, authority, and might of the government would begin to move into unstoppable motion. All this would happen within hours. Oh, sure, it would be thousands of hours, but certainly you could multiply the months times the days times the hours to get the total.
Finally, of course, all those who had participated in any way, shape, or form, would receive medals of commendation, promotions, and bonuses.
I’m staying away from the roach-coaches for a couple of months…
The government will simply wait until nightfall and then release the millions of bats hidden in caves that they have already infected with every known biological agent from anthrax to smallpox. The bats will then swoop down en masse on the monster, who will be dead by sunrise.
Not that cleanup won’t be a real bitch.
Am I alone in thinking that all it would necessarily take would be one Marine sniper/spotter team and a well-chosen perch, like on the top floor of the EMI building?
Now that I think about it, though, assuming the sniper aims for the beastie’s eyes, hitting the first one would probably be a lot easier than hitting the second, provided the first shot isn’t a clean kill. There’d be some serious flailing and pinwheeling about and random, wanton destruction…
To be on the safe side, then, they’d better send at least two sniper teams.
Check please… and do you take Visa?
If a giant monster attacked New Jersey I’d root for the monster.
Gamera is really neat.
He is made of turtle meat…
Man I miss MST3k…
F-14s are air to air fighters, as well as out of active military service in the US as of 2006 - not much use against ground pounders. You’re thinking Mothra, not Godzilla. For Godzilla you’d want F-18s from the naval base; they carry bombs and air to ground missiles and have 20mm miniguns. Although I would think Apaches with Hellfires from the Army would be a better option.
Larry Borgia - you wouldn’t use a B52 for the same reason you wouldn’t use a nuke - the only guarantee you get from a BUFF bomb load is that it’s guaranteed to hit the ground, not any specific target, especially if it’s moving.
Are we talking about any old generic giant monster or say…Godzilla? Because I think Godzilla’s had everything thrown at him already and kept on kickin’ butt.
Haha…late night years ago watching a Godzilla movie on Joe Bob Briggs, he asked the question…why does the army even bother showing up? they’ve done this before and not stopped godzilla…do they expect a lucky shot where Godzilla’s going to yell out "UGH! YA GOT ME!!"? and keel over?
This is the most likely response if any giant monster showed up. Its also hilarious.
Actually B-52s these days can carry the JDAM (GPS-guided bomb); assuming it’s a fairly slow-moving monster, I can easily imagine some forward air controller calling in a B-52 strike on a Cloverfield-sized beastie. (My understanding is that B-52 strikes were pretty much used for close air support in Afghanistan.) A few B-52s each dropping a dozen 2,000 pound bombs on the critter might dissuade it a bit, depending on just how supernaturally tough of a monster we’re talking about here.
A 2000lb would make stew chunks fairly effectively out of any real-world monster, rightly enough - the trick is hitting him. 
JDAMs are GPS and are still targeted at a point, not at a target. Yes, if monster stands still, it would be fine, but I think a better weapon to take him out would be the AGM-65 (IR / TV / Laser Guided missile) - it can track moving targets with much more accuracy. In Afghanistan, the common use of the JDAM is 1. sneak in, find the bad guys, and call in an air strike, or 2. get in a gun fight with the bad guys and call in an air strike. A B52 loitering at 30k feet within a 50 mile radius can dispatch a JDAM and it works fine because the bad guys are effectively static; the JDAM is still a gravity weapon, even if guided, and takes time to get there, especially if it’s moving laterally from drop to target as well as down from high altitude.
I’m not necessarily saying B-52 strikes would be ideal anti-monster tacticts; just that it’s no longer a case of “aim at the general direction of the ground and let fly”.
Look, what you need against any beasty is this once it is perfected:
Navy Railgun
The plus is that it’ll work fine against the Strogg if they start to get uppity.
Mount it on a big tank which has some primitive artificial intelligence built in and you have a first gen ‘Bolo’ ala Keith Laumer. All that will be left is the decision on what to do with 60,000 tons of dino meat splattered across the city.
Yabba Dabba Doo!
Actually, now I have an image of the spotter all by himself, with a ten foot charred hole punched in the wall next to him. He’s talking into a radio, “Ahhhh, I have a situation update headquarters. I recommend that you add “heat vision” to the list of the monster’s known abilities, over.”
Yes, but I think Larry Borgia was