So I’ve been idly wondering about something for the past 15 years or so.
I once saw a man with thalidomide arms go into a men’s room. They were just little floppy wings - not nearly long enough to reach his equipment. I can only think of a couple possibilities:
(a) He has to ask another man to handle his penis, or
(b) He somehow uses his feet to remove his pants, hold his penis, and put his pants back on.
I understand that people without usable arms can learn to do things with their feet, but that’s a pretty sharp angle to have to bend your leg - oh, the charley horses!
Option (a) puts him at the mercy of a stranger. I do wonder how most regular people would react to such a request - would their empathy override the squick factor, or would they ignore/refuse the request? I really don’t know how (or whether!) I would respond if a woman I didn’t know asked me to help her use the toilet.
Can someone solve this mystery for me?
They’re going to create an afterlife just so I can go to hell when I die.
Beyond that, I’d guess a combination of sitting down, using pants that have elastic waistbands, years of practice and being flexible enough to contort yourself in the positions required to raise and lower your pants and maybe it must be possible, and probably using your feet for a lot of the work as well.
With regards to holding his penis, maybe he sits down.
The biggest mystery to me is how he gets the pants on. I bet that without much practice, anybody could shimmy out of uncomplicated pants without using their hands. Getting back in, though?
Okay, I guess it’s plausible that after years of practice he could take care of the matter himself.
I do still wonder how most regular people would handle such a request from a stranger. I started thinking about this today because of an unrelated example I saw this evening of someone depending on the kindness of strangers. I was leaving a restaurant with a bag of leftovers, and a scruffy-looking man with a little girl on his shoulders started to ask me something; I turned away and he said, “Thank you and have a good evening.”
So I’m at least as interested in how a reasonable person would respond to the toilet help request as I am in how an armless man goes to the toilet. Would they ignore/refuse with a clear conscience? Would they ignore/refuse and be eaten alive by guilt for the rest of their lives? Would they give in but feel weird? Would they happily say yes and feel good about having helped a fellow human being?
The question that came to mind was how he’d manage urination?
I was sure the question was going to be about how he’s going to wipe following defecation.
There used to be a panhandler in my area with no arms below the elbows. He would work a major intersection with a bucket held in his stumps and a sign around his neck. (Honestly, the sign was a bit superfluous). I don’t generally like to give to panhandlers at intersections, but I always made an exception for this guy.
I think a woman receiving that request from a man is entitled to decline, if there’s another man around to whom she can refer him. But if a man with no arms asks another man for help going pee, I think it’s unconscionable to consider saying no. Frankly, I’d feel a little guilty if I didn’t throw in a sympathy HJ just to get him through the day.
That would make a really interesting thread. As for me: As long as I was convinced of the legitimacy of his need, I’d help without reservation. Biological imperatives or need always trump social prohibitions. Modesty has to be ignored in certain medical situations. This is one of them.
On edit: Tom beat me to the answer (except for his last sentence:)). I need to type faster.
Good god why did I read this thread. I was up all night thinking about the mechanics of how such a person would pull up their pants. I kept thinking that maybe they have wires connected to their pants that travel up under their shirt. And when they need to pull them up, they grab said wires with their teeth. But the only way for the wires to reach their mouth after their pants are down would be if they were really long. And if they’re that long, there’s no way their head could tilt back enough to lift the pants up. So I’m back to square one. My brain is boggled. My only other guess is that they had a little helper monkey hidden somewhere on their body.
Back in the Stone Age when I waitressed, a group of people came in, and one of them was a man with no arms. Everyone totally freaked out when he took his shoes off and ate with his feet, but my reaction was, “What was he supposed to do, shove his face into the plate?”
