I know what you mean about him, but he has an opportunity to learn something here. Leaving aside his contempt for people different than him, organizations do need some people who are the stickly bean counting type. Both sides in this equation need to develop some tolerance and flexibility.
I agree that if it isn’t done with respectful humour it shouldn’t be done at all. But I think there is a vast amount of territory between “a nod” and “pandering.”
I’ve argued a lot that in some situations not wearing a suit doesn’t mean that you are not serious about working. But here the situation is reversed in a sense. He should wear what he damn well pleases, and not feel he must conform to what his group is wearing. I no more support shorts and t-shirts as a uniform than a suit as a uniform without a good business reason. Because other people do it isn’t a good business reason.
Ok, but I didn’t suggest he change his clothing at all. Actually I think he shouldn’t change his clothing style at all from whatever he’s been doing for whatever reason he’s been doing it until he’s worked out some of the issues here. It would be seen as pandering, as you mentioned before. He needs to tolerate this crew, not become one of them. And they need to tolerate him even if he wears a suit. I think the clothes are just a canard here.
You say he doesn’t follow instructions and then seems terrified of that being addressed. This makes me ask 2 questions:
1.) Are the instructions clear, in writing, and reiterated more than once?
2.) Are the instructions ridiculous?
I ask because I’ve run into both of these problems in the workplace before. At one job I had an ongoing project I was doing and I was told to email a list of people because they wanted to be able to track the contact in writing. So I did. Then I got disciplined for not calling them. So the next time I had to do that project I called everybody. Then I got disciplined for not emailing everyone. So the next time I emailed everyone and called everyone and I got disciplined because they changed the way that project was supposed to have been done while I was out on jury duty and now the emails were supposed to be in a different format. From their perspective I wasn’t following instructions. From my perspective they were insane assholes who couldn’t decide what they wanted. There is a chance that your current employee is running into similar issues that could easily be addressed without a problem through proper, thorough communication.
I don’t know if it’s an issue of “respect” so much that I understand the “fratboy” mentality more than the “nerd”. I get guys going out for drinks after work. I don’t get role playing card games.
It does seem like the “nerd” mentality is they have to think they are smarter than everyone and they don’t like being corrected.
When you refer to the office as a nursery room, it’s about respect. If particular employees are having trouble being corrected, that’s an individual employee problem; when you project it onto an entire subculture, you limit your ability to manage people from that subculture.
There is a grain of truth to both your perception of them and their perception of you. They perceive themselves to be smarter than you. Well, it’s certainly true that they are probably better at technical work than you are, otherwise they’d have hired you to do tech work, wouldn’t they? You perceive them to think they are better than you – well, they probably do think that, a bit; I’ve never met a tech person, including myself, who didn’t secretly (or, sometimes, not-so-secretly) think that tech work was more meaningful than management. However, the thoughtful tech nerds will still understand that management is important and has to be done by someone.
Does anyone like being corrected? Especially by someone who doesn’t understand him? I’ve certainly seen times when management was not very happy about being corrected by tech staff.
That’s why we keep harping on finding a peer mentor for this guy, by the way.
And he’s been promoted into this role. Presumably because management outside this branch does think that his “tone” is more appropriate than the “tone” of the nerdy techs. If the nerdy techs break him, its possible that they’ll like his replacement or the replacement policies even less.
I also suspect msmith’s Doper personality is somewhat more mocking and blunt than he actually is in real life in a professional setting. I know my Doper personality is not a complete match for my real life personality. Just because we read some contempt into his posting, doesn’t mean that 1) its actually there or 2) if its there, its enough there to be detected in real life.
I think you’re right, that’s how this happened. It’s not necessarily choosing one or the other, but upper management may want to see some balance in this situation.
I’m constantly shocked that Doper’s personalities may not match their real ones. Am I the only one who’s the same in real life as I am on-line? Anyway, I suspect his posts reveal something about his nature, but probably not exactly the way he sounds. For instance, I suspect he is somewhat intimidated by these ‘nursery school kids’.
I wouldn’t say “intimidated.” I’d say “perplexed” is a more apt word. When you are used to professional acting and dressed employees it would be a bit jolting to come to an environment where the staff is one step away from playing dungeons and dragons in wizard robes.
He might be perplexed as well. I can’t tell based on the minimal information here. But it’s not an uncommon circumstance. There’s an intimidation factor in many management positions. In the olden days you could be a manager of a steno pool or the mailroom. In the 21st century, managers are often in charge of people more productive than they can ever be.
I read no contempt in the OP. Look, it’s fair to say the culture as described is juvenile. Adults do not play games when they’re supposed to be working, and they dress and act like adults. Having fun at work is great, but that’s not the same as going to work and not working.
As to the problem employee, I’d agree that’s what needed here may be an empathetic approach. If someone is struggling with performance and reacting poorly to review sof their performance, take a step past that and talk about expectations, and ask what they need to achieve them.
The OP has shown contempt for his co-workers in other threads. And most adults are playing a game at work, they just don’t admit it. And just how is an adult supposed to dress?
Well they shouldn’t dress as they would for role-playing games or a comic book convention…
In accordance with the corporate dress code. These are common place among employers. However, some locales like California and in tech companies, a relaxed dress code is common place to attract the talent they need. YMMV.
Why not? They’re not operating machinery, so there’s no safety issue.
It’s not just about safety. It’s about creating a professional work environment. I’m not saying they should wear suits. But there is a middle ground between suits and Star Trek uniforms.
Star Trek uniforms are professional attire (at least on Star Ships). And the significant feature of a professional environment is productivity, not clothes, except in the fashion industry and other similar fields. Clothing standards have nothing to do with the job these people are doing.
Well I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree.