HAHAHAHA!!! HYSTERICAL! 
heh I know you did this just to prove a point but I would like to say even you didn’t feel right without SOME context to what you were saying.
That said this thread is hilarious. Carry on.
My SO gave me three ducks for Valentine’s Day. They are blue and red and green, and have horns. They are so cute!
“Aha! Pronoun trouble!”
duck, duck… GOOSE!
Bad things happen when one skims instead of reading ALL the posts. Forgive me, I know not what I do.
What? All this discussion of a duck and not one person has asked …
Did it echo?
:: Ducks ::
Did you jump?
No way man, that woulda been a steal.
I don’t know where you live but around here people tend to look a bit askance at those who are in the habit of carrying ducks into caves. Carrying a duck at all can get you into trouble, but carrying one into a cave… <shudder>
I hear Paris Hilton thought it’d be harmless having sex with a duck in the room. Those pesky hidden duck-cameras…
Some people keep cats; I keep roommates. They’re much tougher to house-train than cats, but they learn much quicker that the ducks are not to be messed with. Also, they fetch my slippers and newspaper just as well as any stupid beagle.
You may have my duck with all my blessings when you learn how to spell bright.
Well that’s where you’re wrong, buddy. No shame here. I’m just ducky.
Are you sure your SO didn’t give you three fuc**remainder of posted eaten by the Official SDMB Thread Monster: eating your finest posts since 1995-ish[/RIGHT]
A duck helped teach me how to walk.
Really.
Waddle we do until you explain how?
Now you’ve got this in my head:
I want a new duck.
Not a swan or a goose.
Just a drake I can dress real cute.
Think I’m gonna name him Bruce.
I Want a New Duck, by “Weird Al” Yankovic
<Groan…>
Anyway. The road in front our house retained water very well, so there was usually a nice-sized puddle there. And apparently it was just the thing for a wild duck to call home.
He moved in, decided our yard was his territory and the people who lived there were his pets. I was a toddler at the time, and (so the story goes) I would do my toddling about in the yard. When I would fall over, the duck would run over, quacking at me and prodding me to get back up.
Very cute scene, I’ve been told. I’m sure that if camcorders were prevalent in 1969, there’d be an extra 10 grand in the family coffers from an AFV win. 
** dutchboy208 ** you better be careful if you ever take your duck to Rotterdam. :eek:
Does it quack?
34 posts, and no Joe Penner references?
Ah, a fine duck dinner has come to us!
500 cool points to anyone who knows where that came from
WARNING: Ducks eat flowers.
Not a problem, unless you try to grow flowers and to also let your ducks roam free. Ours would sit all day amongst the pansies, steadily devouring the whole lot.
My spoon is too big.
I think this is the first time in the history of the Straight Dope, I can finally ask a question using solely a Doper’s nickname:
Why a Duck?
Tripler
This is truly a red-letter moment for the SDMB.
Because chicks dig ducks.