Yeah, I think there’s some kind of filter on my phone that makes me look like a half-wit.
[stern glare at the peanut gallery]
I cannot take a selfie. All the tools and skills are available. I just have some sort of syndrome that makes me duck if I see a camera, even if I am holding it. Kind of like I detest the sound of my voice (as heard by anyone else) so I stay away from recording equipment.
I really never take selfies. But there are certainly really common errors that I see time after time. The most common is that people feel they are too close to the camera so they pull their head in towards their shoulders which gives them a squashed face/double chin.
I cannot whistle. I can, sort of, make a faint whistling sound by inhaling through puckered lips, but just barely.
I cannot style my hair. Tried for most of my teenage and adult life but just never got even halfway competent - even a basic bob turned under has always failed me. I finally gave up.
I cannot, apparently, walk without injuring myself. Every single adult bone injury (lessee: two broken elbows, one broken foot, one probable broken tailbone, one broken toe, too many sprained ankles to count) has been caused by insane activities such as walking down stairs, stepping up onto a curb, or walking on level flooring through the laundry room.
I can whistle, I can even carry a tune whistling, but I can’t whistle loudly on my fingers. Tried every technique, on one finger, two fingers, everything, but it never works. Cost me some creds when I was a boy, but by now, I’ve learned to live with it 
.
I could never whistle the “normal” way through pursed lips; still can’t. The only way I can is exhaling between the tip of my tongue and my front teeth: so basically just making a sharp “s” sound.
I can’t bend and touch my toes.
Never could. Same with my dad.
I can barely reach below the knee.
I’m old enough not to be particularly flexible in any direction these days. But even when I was young I was the same. I was never flexible in the forward direction. Weirdly though, one time in gymnastics in high school the instructor had us do back arches (where you are bending in the reverse direction) and I could do them freakishly well - to the point where the instructor was asking if I did gymnastics outside school or something. Which I assure you I did not.
It’s as if my spine is in backwards - the flexibility is back rather than forward!
I am as stiff as a board.
No flexibility either way.
Could be you’re dead. Or just took too much Viagra.
I was talking about my back actually 