I can’t fold a fitted sheet to save my life. Many people have shown me how it is done. I’m pretty sure they use some sort of dark magic.
I can’t tie a tie, not even the most basic knot. I’ve never owned a tie and only wear one in the most extreme emergencies, so the two or three times I did, someone else tied it for me.
You need to breath out through your nose all the while you’re upside-down. That stops water getting up it.
Or you can use your lower lip to push your philtrum up against your nose.
I’m trying that now and I don’t see how it is supposed to work.
Are you currently upside-down, under water?
Have you seen my credit card account?
Do fajitas need to be rolled? Maybe your thinking of taquitos or tamales.
I can’t watch youtube videos. Not only do I not learn much from people talking at me (I have to read and possibly look at pictures), but tolerating some random person on a screen ramble pointlessly while holding or standing next to the object I wanted to learn about, for me, lasts about five seconds.
Folded might be a better word. Whatever you call it, I cannot seem to put the ingredients in the tortilla and form a nice little tube of goodies without everything falling out and getting all over my fingers.
The thing I cannot stand about videos is the manner in which they present stuff in order to shape you view. It is especially irritating to have to listen to someone explain stuff I have already heard ad nauseum – when reading, one can easily jump past that stuff, take how ever much time one needs to comprehend the subject matter, and pause to mull over a thing without being forced onward at the presenter’s pace (and those goddam edits to remove natural pauses are infuriating).
If someone presents a video as support for their argument, I choose not to watch it. Show me the text.
I’ve noticed lately that our local news presents stories by first telling you how people feel about it, getting a few comments from the moron on the street, and THEN telling you WTF they’re talking about.
In the old days, newspapers used a “pyramid” style, where the reporter wrote the crux of the story in the first few paragraphs and expanded into the details. They did this for the benefit of the editor, so that the text could be fit into howsoever many inches were available and truncated without losing too much. These days, that art is gone, largely because online content is not space limiting, but it has started to creep into print as well.
I got a little bit tonight. Took the dogs out in the Jeep, and spotted a murderous, scum-bag Coyote and dispatched him with extreme prejudice at about 70 yards. Made my entire month. Nice big adult male. Done. Gone from this world. Satisfaction!
Can’t swim.
Can’t count backwards from 100 all the way through without losing concentration.
I have an extremely short attention span when being read to. I think it’s because the only time I can remember ever being read to as a child was in fifth grade, when the teacher read us a book in class over the course of a few weeks.
You’ve already been told how to feel about it – why would you want any further details?
I have a cousin who sometimes reads some news story to me. He reads all the words, and does it rather fast, with minimal texture, but after the first sentence or two, I tend to lose the thread of it. When I read out loud, I do a great deal of omission (e.g., the explanatory clauses such as who a person is or what state Tupelo is the capital of) and paraphrasing and try to add some texture (intonation and emphasis) to make it easier to follow.
You realize that killing coyotes doesn’t make coyotes go away? I have a friend who is a sheep rancher where what they call ‘predator pressure’ is ever-present. She told me that her sheep-guardian dogs, who live with the flocks, develop a kind of relationship with the coyote packs in which the coyotes know where they won’t be hassled by the dogs and where they will. It is something the whole pack knows and passes to the pups. Kill that pack and new, clueless coyotes will move in, making a lot more work for the dogs, with the possibility that some reckless coyote will kill sheep before the dogs can move in.
All that happened was that you satisfied your blood lust. Coyotes just kill to eat. They aren’t murderous. They aren’t scumbags either, they are just animals doing their part in the web of life. What are you doing?
It made that one go away.