It me and my imagination once again. Ya know, if its a vaguely amusing and doesn’t result in any injuries or things that would get me arrested then I might as well do it…
That life view makes for interesting dreams.
So last night…
To set the stage, I’ve been playing a LOT of Firearms (a Half life mod)… hence the military theme of the dream.
I was in charge of getting a new weapon developed for modern warfare. I was working with the animatronics division of Disney (don’t ask). With my direction we made
Wait for it
ROBOJESUS!
Yes, folks… A robotic jesus sporting a full complement of nasty sharp and pointy things that pop out of his arms to rend and disembowel the unbeliever(1), and the ability to use and sort of handheld slug thrower.
We had a winner. It would talk, interact with the people it encountered. Which made it perfect for infiltration missions.
“Wait, you don’t want to shoot me. I’m the son of god, I mean you no harm. I want to bring peace and understanding to the world…” By this point it’d be close enough to disembowel half a dozen men.
We tweaked the skin colour and the language program so we could make robots of all major religious/spiritual leaders. The Ghandi one was scary.
It made fighting terrorism in the middle east a lot easier.
But it also added a whole new level of uncertanty into the Israeli issue.
Luckilly I managed to apply for the toy tie-in rights before we went into full production. Man, those Killer Jesus action figures (Blood of the innocent sold seperatly) were HUGE! Blew ‘tickle me elmo’ right out of the water.
Granted we had a problem with technicians. Apparently hosing the gore off the Jesus robots causes psychological problems.
Oh well.
1 - Those who don’t believe in doing exactly what we say.
I’m not evil, I just have a rather over active imagination and I’m easily amused.
Thanks for giving me my first laugh of the day.