Case in point: Piper Dog is lying on my lap on her back; I’m rubbing her neck and belly; she’s making little sighs of contentment. I know what she’s thinking: “Oh, this is good.” She doesn’t want it to stop, and at most, she nudge my hand with her nose.
Seem situation with Piper Cat: I’m stroking his neck and belly; he’s purring; picture of contentment. And what is he thinking? Something like this: “Oh, this is good, good, oh that’s the right spot. How do I repay Piper for a great massage? I know, I’ll bite him!”
So I promptly toss him off my lap and he stalks away, affronted. “That was a good bite. Don’t know what he was upset about. Hmmph! Humans! And by the way, where’s my supper?”
Some cats can get over stimulated pretty quickly. They genuinely do feel good until suddenly it doesn’t. The best thing to do is look for physical cues that things aren’t feeling so good anymore. Laid back ears, stiff body, twitching tail. Those are all signs of an annoyed cat. If you start seeing those, then stop petting.
My kitties do the biting thing, but it’s how they start cleaning, they do it to each other too. My kitty will lightly bite me once (not even enough to hurt) to say “DON’T MOVE”, then hold my hand in place with his paws and start licking it all over. I take it as a sign of affection.
My cat likes to be rubbed on her belly, but it also gets her quite excited and eventually she’ll try nipping my hand. It’s her way of playing with me, not even a real bite, and she’s never actually hurt me this way, so I let her get away with it. Sometimes she’ll try to pin my hand with her back paws. It’s fun for her, not annoyance.
In my experience, when my cat is actually annoyed, she will yowl and stalk away, but then forget about it 10 seconds later. I just laugh at her. Growling and hissing are much more serious distress signals.
Edit: Not that I want to give the impression that I provoke or tease my cat until she hisses. She never hisses at me, but at other cats when we have the misfortune to be forced into a position to put her near them. Then comes the growl, then the fight if somebody isn’t standing right there.
One of mine was enjoying a brushing the other day. He was happily purring, eyes half-closed, as I brushed. I thought he was having a great time. Then suddenly, wham! I had a set of claws in my hand.
He could have used a different method to tell me it was time to stop, but he didn’t.
On difference between cats and digs is that for a dog, lying with belly exposed is an unambiguously submissive and relaxed posture. Whereas a cat on their back has all five pointies engaged and ready to rumble. It makes them think of fighting and aggressive play. Not relaxation and submission. And to a cat, if don’t want to play rough you’re just a boring jerk.
Miss Maggie engages in her favorite playtime game by rolling over on her back on the floor. This is my cue to initiate ‘Stomp the Kitty’ with as little delay as possible.
This is accomplished by laying a foot across her middle and pretending to stomp her flat. She thinks this is **great **fun and immediately applies all pointy appendages to my foot with great vigor.
I should point out that I have something on that foot with the tensile strength of oh… I dunno… kevlar… before i get anywhere near that cat’s tummy.
There was definitely a conflict with my old kitty, Raven, when it came to tummy rubs. When she was very mellow, she would roll over and offer her belly while purring, but if I made the slightest move towards her, all five pointy ends engaged my tender skin. But then, Raven spent the first six months of her life on the street, so I think her instincts were in conflict: happy=show belly to human; human reaching for belly = DEATH!
My current kitties have known nothing but loving scritches and the occasional squirt from a water bottle. So, when they show me their bellies, I know they really are looking for scritches, rubs, tickles, combs, and raspberries.
Piper, could you tell whether the bite in question was a playful bite, a warning bite, a love bite, or a vicious bite? (Only the last would have been intended to really hurt.)
As an additional data point, my two cats (who are sisters and usually get along just fine) can go in an instant from grooming each other and washing each others’ faces, to hissing and cat fisticuffs.
Well, yeah those signs aren’t always there. I mean, they ARE cats after all. They want to keep us on our toes. But seriously, what kind of cats do you guys have? I’ve had about 10 cats over my lifetime and none of them ever did the random bite or claw on me. All of my cats have just loved being cuddled and petted and snuggled for hours. Hell, I had one guy who loved getting raspberries on his stomach. Of course…I always have male gingers, so that probably explains it.
The thing you have to ask yourself when it comes to cat bites and scratches is this - would it hurt if you had fur? Because as far as they’re concerned, they’re communicating with another cat (violence is how cats communicate), and they don’t necessarily want to hurt you. It’s not their fault that you’re walking around like an idiot with your skin all exposed.
Cats are not typically inclined to be submissive. They do well in packs or as solitary beasts. At best, you’re their equal–possibly their bitch if they catch on you’re the one who provides food and lets them have their fill before you, certainly in secret, take your share. I think it’s fair to say they’re loving, but they’re only loyal to the extent it furthers their own interests. Frankly I like a critter that leaves me alone and doesn’t ask a lot of me, and that appreciates being left alone. It’s an odd sort of friendship, but the time you DO spend together as equals is sometimes better than time spent with human friends.
