When I was about 5 or so, I managed to poke myself in the eye with a sharp stick. It stopped hurting pretty fast, but I had scratched my cornea or something, so I had to wear an eyepatch for a while. There aren’t any pictures of me at the time, but I imagine that I looked like a very samll pirate.
And to show you what a fast learner I was: On the day the doctor decided I didn’t have to wear the eyepatch anymore, I went home and started playing with the very same stick, and poked myself in the other eye. Smart, aren’t I?
Laugh hard; it’s a long way to the bank.