I’ve been to 3 high school graduation ceremonies in the past 5 years (2 children, 1 niece). I’ve decided that they are my least favorite social occasion. I’d rather go to a funeral (at least, of someone I didn’t know particularly well.)
It’s not the logistics, although they’re usually awful: an hour or two sitting on a football bleacher, 50 yards from your graduate, seated next to a family of yokels with air horns. It’s the speeches.
I like good oratory. I can sit through a speech. But here’s what we had at last nights: 3 different speakers (one of which was a set of 3 senior women, who took turns, interjecting “witty” commentary, and occasionally speaking in unison). The subject of all 3 speeches seemed to be: gee, what fond memories. It seemed like only yesterday we were timid freshmen. Now, we rool. Shout out to the parents & teachers.
Apparently, the seminal event in the past 4 years for these leaders of tomorrow – not the war on terror, not the environment, not the Bush administration. No, it was that they were robbed in the judging of the spirit competition during Homecoming Week, 2003. All 3 speakers mentioned it. I’m surprised it wasn’t reported more widely; someone might’ve won a Pulitzer. :rolleyes:
I don’t expect 18 years olds to be profound. But jeez, can you remove your head from your own ass long enough to spout something other than in-jokes to your friends? If these are the leaders of tomorrow…God help us. My high school commencement occurred at the peak of Vietnam, and our speakers managed to make note of the fact. Imagine that.
Memo to school administrators: when you pick speakers, lock them in a room for an hour and teach them how to write a speech. Make sure your speakers pick different topics.
Memo to valedictorians: if you don’t have any gravitas, any perspective on the world and your entry into it – fake it. If you can’t fake it, steal it off the internet. It worked for history class.
End of rant.