They are inherited from my dear deceased grandmother. I love my grandmother. I would hate to speak ill of her. But my toenails are ALL HER FAULT.
When I was a kid I went on a school trip to a wildlife preserve, and the gamewardens showed us neat things like bees’ nests and stuffed foxes and skulls and…
Well, then there was that poor little rodent. I don’t remember what kind it was, but it had a maladjusted jaw.
The thing with rodents is that they gnaw on stuff, which grinds down their teeth. However, if their jaw is off just a bit, the teeth don’t grind down like they are supposed to. In this case, the bottom tooth kept growing and growing and growing and eventually ended up curling under, driving itself into the brain of the poor dumb forest creature and killing it.
[sub]If I didn’t hate dentists so much I’d include a PSA here, but I do, so I won’t. But you know what I WOULD say here if I didn’t hate dentists so much. So THERE.[/sub]
So anyhow. Gramma and her inherited toenails. They grow kinda like that rodent I mentioned up there. Only sideways.
While this problem mainly concerns my big toenail, most of my toenails have split down the center at one time or another. They are thick, brittle, and extremely unattractive. I will not wear open-toed shoes. I will go barefoot only in tall grass and/or among close friends or family members.
If it weren’t for that stupid layoff/lack of insurance thing I think I’d finally break down and go in for surgery. Especially after the largish amounts of pus and blood I pried out of my toe a bit ago.
I’m tired of cutting those stupid Vs into my nails, but til I get some cash and/or insurance, I’m stuck.