I hate people saying "use your common sense".

In My Humble Opinion
21

He had the rarest of all things, common sense - Oscar Wilde
Slipper,

I think it’s a non-answer which people use 1) when they’ve dismissed you as a simpleton who is not worth responding to 2) when they don’t know how to answer but don’t want to admit they don’t know or 3) they’re the kind of person who fails entirely to realize that something may seem obvious yet be wrong or obvious to one person but not to another without the latter being an idiot. In all cases, end that conversation, this person is very unlikely to provide you with information on this point.

In other words, your attempts to show those people that “use your common sense” is worse than useless is very much a high effort/low probability/low effect action. Someone saying that is a cue about the person, just like someone who says “it is what it is” has just signalled that they are unable or unwilling to think a point with any precision.

22

If you want to start a double debate, ‘It is what it is’ has some very legitimate uses as well. I work in IT and that is perfectly apt term in many situations. Some people may use it to dismiss people unnecessarily but it is probably used more often to point out that something can’t do some obscure thing because it was never designed for it. It is perfectly apt phrase when used correctly and the person that lacks true understanding isn’t usually the person saying it.

23

It can also be used to pull people back into reality when they are dealing exceptional situations. Some people have a tendency to look at a situation as the way they want it rather than the way it actually exists. Your budget looks horrible? It is finalized so it is what it is and you better make it work for the next year. Don’t go into denial. You only have a limited set of tools to work with.

24

You may think it provides useful information but it is what it is.

25

I understand both of the phases given as examples perfectly and they have helped me at times. It isn’t like people are saying 'Whatever!" when they use them correctly. They do have legitimate uses.

26

Let me make it clear. Humans sometimes perform on a practical level well below their intellectual capability even in the best of circumstances and it can drop a lot from that. A simple reminder of not to do something really dumb can be helpful whether it is riding with a friend who has been drinking or throwing shotgun shells into a campfire. Everyone knows not to do that yet many people still do it. Use common sense is perfectly good advice for parents to children or employers to employees. A simple reminder to think before you act can have great benefits

27

I agree that most people use it in a condescending fashion, but the proper use for the phrase is when someone tries to over think something basic, and in doing so, forgets something else basic.

To use your example, let’s say that we are sitting on a 20th story balcony and I see you flipping your cigarette butts off of the balcony. I go and get a bowling ball to throw off of the balcony, using my advanced knowledge that all items fall at the same speed, and tell you that throwing a bowling ball off of the balcony is no different than you throwing your butts off of the balcony.

Instead of reminding me of the “force=mass X acceleration” equation, you just tell me to use my “common sense.” I think that is appropriate…

28

Your point about the butts would only apply in a vacuum. Just sayin’-

29

That’s my point. Would you see me hoisting a bowling ball over the edge and explain air resistance and F=M*A, or just tell me to use my fucking common sense and not throw a bowling ball off of a balcony?

30

To me it’s existential. We can’t change the way things are. It’s like a shortened version of the Serenity prayer.

31

You don’t think telling someone the Serenity Prayer is dismissive? I would find it even worse. At least “It is what it is” can be used to commiserate, meaning something like “Yeah, I know. It sucks. But there’s nothing we can do about it, I guess. We just have to deal with it. I feel for you, though.” The serenity prayer, when spoken from one person to another, always comes off to me as an admonishment for not being serene enough.

The same goes for you. What you say the phrases mean doesn’t stop them from being condescending. Just because something is condescending doesn’t mean it carry insight. You’re still admonishing someone for not thinking something through or for thinking something can be changed that can’t. The problem is that people tend to hear the condescension over the insight.

There may be legitimate uses for both phrases (I know there is for “It is what it is,” as I’ve mentioned above.) but I don’t think you’ve hit on them.

For clarity’s sake, I’m talking about the phrases “It is what it is,” and “Use common sense” not the very use of the term “common sense.” There are obviously ways to use that term that aren’t condescending.

32

The phrase is not a fight against science. It’s the fact that some people have great difficulty dealing with real world problems that pop up as they happen. Some of those set of people are idiots. Others are smart but have no common sense. It is nothing to be proud of.

33

Nope. Quite the opposite, in fact.

It’s signalling that they’ve spotted that you are unable or unwilling to think about a situation with any clarity.

‘It is what it is, it’s not what you so desperately wish it to be, so stop railing against reality, or at least stop bothering me with your delusions.’

34

It’s a polite way of saying “stop being a moron”.

35

You can think that if you want but it is what it is.

36

What is the 'it ’ and ‘is’ in your statement? It doesn’t apply to your use of the term which leads me to believe that you don’t understand the phrase at all. You seem to be the one that isn’t demonstrating comprehension.

If I complained to the SDMB administration that moderating wasn’t to my liking, ‘it is what it is’ really is a dismissal or my complaint. If I complained that the SDMB didn’t cover as many topics as Wikipedia and wasn’t organized the same way, that would be a perfectly valid response if I didn’t understand that it was never meant to be the same thing and predates Wikipedia.

37

That’s the great thing about using that expression. You can say “The way I describe that phenomenon/entity is the way it actually is” and foreclose debate without needing to argue that your description is correct. You just provide your description and then say “it is what it is”. Sometimes you don’t even need to provide a description and can use it on its own. My description of what it is is at post 21.

I can believe that you, personally, are not a jerk about the use of that phrase and use it in much the same way that “That’s life!” is used.

38

To be fair, part of my job is to give people the news of the equivalent of ‘it is what it is’ including high-level managers in mega-corps but I never use that phrase. I think it is rude and coarse. I can stretch out the same idea in more words that are tactful but the idea is the same. I would only support the more abbreviated version using that exact phrase when someone has become hostile and they obviously don’t understand anything about the issues at hand.

39

The bitch at my work told me to "…use my common sense " again.
The situation was we have been given new computers which is actually a laptop which we are not using as a laptop but as a desktop computer.
I did not want to ask a question like ‘what are the rules concerning the use of the laptops?’ So I asked her if I could rest my drinks on the top of the laptop. Her response was “Use your common sense”. I replied with “So common sense works with laptops. I never knew that before.”
Now I cannot be honest with this woman because I need to keep my job and she is kind of my supervisor. She is not officially, but unofficially she is.
Can anyone help with a better response that I should have given?
Thanks

40

I was originally going to post regarding the general term of “common sense” but responding in particular to post #39 helps me embellish my response:

One of the reasons the term “common sense” is becoming obsolete (as drew870mitchell notes in post #16) is because the widespread use of technological innovations is occurring at an increasingly rapid pace. A decade ago, it was impossible to watch a full length feature movie on a hand-held device. Now everybody in the Western World has at least one iPhone on which they can watch streaming videos of a World Cup Football (soccer) game as it occurs. However, watching that exciting game while driving downtown defies “common sense” because the distraction is dangerous to you and others near the road.:mad:

The point is that, with new technologies, there are new protocols, rules, hazards, and possibilities for humans to interact with the technology. So my stock phrase for quite a while has been “Common Sense just isn’t very common any more.”:cool:

In the mid-1970’s people didn’t even think about trying to maintain a telephone conversation while driving a few blocks away to grab a soda at the convenience store – the cord to the receiver just wouldn’t stretch that far and “common sense” suggested one shouldn’t try to do it. Now it’s easy to keep talking on a cellular phone while driving from San Francisco to San Diego and while nobody seems to think twice about it, we’re learning that it’s a bad idea. The “common sense” explanation of not ripping your phone out of the wall is gone and it’s difficult for most people to grasp the abstract concepts of spatial cognition and mental visualization. To the average person, “common sense” suggests there’s nothing wrong with chatting on a cell-phone while driving. To those who understand the research or reports upon it, “common sense” still suggests driving while distracted is foolish (at best).:frowning:

Case in point: Post #39
When desktop computers were new, drinking anything near a keyboard, CRT monitor, or PC tower was an invitation for disaster. One small slip and spilled liquid would short out the electrical circuitry, wasting the peripheral or tower and quite possibly ruining the entire computer. But over time and for various reasons, monitors were lifted off the desks and towers were tucked away and keyboards were either made spill-resistant or people added rubber covers over the keys. It has become increasingly common to be able to drink while using the computer and to be able to set your container right there on the top of the desk without any harm coming from dripping condensation or even a spill. The “common sense” regarding computer usage has changed considerably over the years.:eek:

But some things don’t change. The structure of a normal human body, for instance, and the basics of kinesiology.

We are well aware that it’s difficult and dangerous to balance on one’s toes all day, even when additional support is provided by a half-inch wide spike under the heel. The next time your coworker twists her ankle while walking around, point out to her that shoes with heels may be pretty but are defiant of common sense. :smack:

In fact, much of the world’s fashions are spiteful of weather, economics, workday routines, and active lifestyles. Pointing out just how her clothing, earrings, tattoo design, or nail polish is pretty but defies common sense may get her to stop using the worn-out phrase. It might also raise her ire and get you fired, so use your comm— er…prudence and best judgement before acting on this advice.:smiley:

—G!

…but Everybody wants to put me down, they say
I’m goin’ crazy
That’s right I got a lotta water in my brain
I…ain’t got no common sense
I got nobody left to believe…
…–Freddy Mercury (Queen)
…Somebody To Love
…A Day at the Races