“Threw your back out, eh?”
“I’d love to throw it out and be rid of it for once and all.”
And you want to know what’s worse than being “ma’amed” or “sirred”? The middle-age spread that fills up your torso with unwanted jiggle.
I’m a 40-year-old biddy.
See what you have to look forward to?
Wait until the first time you’re asked if you want the senior citizen discount.
Just this week I noticed, not joint stiffness, but that I wasn’t as limber as I used to be. I wasn’t doing anything fun when this happened – just trying to use the curling iron. 
Ditto what everybody said about physical therapy – and regular professional massage.
Yup, welcome to the club. Apparently, humans were designed to last about 35 years. You’ve got 5 more years, and game over, man, game over.
And I really do want those kids to stay offa my lawn.
And that is a best-case scenario.
Regards,
Shodan - who has twenty years on you
Do we need to alert AARP of a potential new member? 
Before long you’ll be sittin’ on your front porch with a BB gun to shoot at all the goldurned whippersnappers who want to pick up the apples from the apple tree that are rotting on your front yard. You’ll be hollerin’ at MsRobyn to hurry up and get dressed or you’ll miss the early bird special down at Denny’s, cause if’n you ain’t there by 4:30 all the good parking spaces are gone. You’ll be on the freeway complaining about how folks treat it like the Indianapolis 500 as you drive 45 MPH. You’ll brag about pulling an all nighter which will mean you didn’t have to get up and pee at two AM. You’ll complain to the manager of the grocery store because there ain’t enough of those scooter buggys. You’ll engage in heated debates on the merits of Fiberall vs Metamucil, BenGay vs. Deep Heat and Generic vs Brand Names.
Just remember, old farts never die… they just hang around and smell funny.
Oh, and this is just icing on the cake.
In my geography class we were discussing Ethiopia, which, for people my age and older, automatically conjures up images of the 1985-1986 famine, USA For Africa singing “We Are The World”, and Live Aid.
Imagine my surprise when I discovered that my teacher and I were the only two people in the entire room who were alive in 1985. :eek:
Lord have mercy.
how true, how true!
you forgot to say we did this barefoot - and were thankful for it.
Seriously ‘Doors’ (may I call you that?), you’re only as old as you feel. There are days I feel 80 and days I feel 30. I’m 47 and have a slew of things wrong with me, most of which make it pretty damn difficult to get around and do simple chores. But hey! It’s way better than the alternative (death). Physical Theapry is a good idea for yur immediate issues - You’ll want to get a workout plan in place and impliment tht as soon as possible - Concentrate on things tha strengthen the muscles surrounding your major joints (knees, shoulders, hips) because those are the ones that will go first in 15-30 years (depending on current usage/abuse). But if the muscles are strong, you’ll get thru the joint pains with little or no trouble
Oh, just wait for the day when you go into the doctor’s office for one of your many aches and pains and discover that the doctor is younger than you.
A good professional massage can work wonders for tight muscles and pinched nerves.
I’m 48 & have a herniated disc which gives me a discomfort at times. I’ve had a few episodes of it getting bad enough I practically needed help going to the bathroom, but it happened almost 20 years ago and it’s mostly not a big deal. I won’t let it be a big deal if I can help it!
And my knees are maybe a teensy bit stiffer than they used to be, I have a habit of sitting crosslegged a lot and it’s a bit sore uncurling. Other than that I really don’t feel any different than in my 20s.
Exercise - walking, I swear by it! And don’t get fat. I’m on the other side of menopause now, and it’s a little harder to keep that squishy midsection thing from happening, but it’s certainly do-able. For a couple of years I was going to the gym and doing weights…I got almost ripped, and during that time my back and joints barely bothered me at all. Then I moved and stopped going…I miss it and should get back to a gym.
I think it comes down, in part, to expectations. I know people who simply expect to get out of shape, sore and overweight as they get older. So, they do. But it’s not inevitable. Feh. 30 ain’t nothing, anyways.
Lumbar pain. My buddy too. September 21, 2000. Fell off of a ladder, went 16 feet, landed flat on my feet. Suffered a wide open fracture of the L-3. Bone never regenerated. Disk above torn partially open. Ugly think, constant pain. Ugly thing. I am currently investigating bloodsucking leeches, accupuncture and methadone as possible pain management techniques. And yeah, I’m dead serious.
I’m 43, btw. Sorry for your pains, Airman. I am damned gratefu that my injury happened after my kids were too big to want to pick up and hold. Grit yer teeth and enjoy being his Dive Bomb Target. ( figures, you teach him games like that. 
)
Cartooniverse
Feh,
Just the other day I was listening to the radio station thinking to myself: “Damned kids, with their new aged rocking roll.”
It was no sooner than that the radio DJ comes on and says “Your listening to 93.3 the Bone classic rock station!” (or something like that)
I got to thinking to myself “Damn I can’t even listen to the classic rock stations anymore!”
Guess I’m going to have to turn the dail to KFSL from now on.
Eh? The Bone plays “biker music” or “wannabe biker music”, mostly. Heavy metal, hard rock, and they add current songs to their playlist. While I enjoy the music, I really don’t care for the blatant references to “bones”.
92.5, KZPS, is the classic rock station in the Metroplex. Or at least it’s the only one I hear referring to itself as classic rock. It’s a Clear Channel station, which means that I try to avoid it if at all possible, but I do have a button set for it in my car.
As for feeling old, yeah, I’ve been dealing with doctors younger than I am. Heck, a lot of doctors look to be about my daughter’s age!
I recommend seeing a chiropractor. They’re great with back-pain; that’s my experience and that of many of my aqaintances.
Never mind doctors, the new rector in our parish is younger than me. A lot younger. And it’s not his first career. And I’m not even fucking fifty. 
Here’s one for you…in conversation this weekend with a new acquaintance, and I mention the movie Splash!. My nineteen-year-old conversation partner had never heard of it!
GAH!