I need an Illinois lawyer to do about 20 minutes’ worth of work. Actually, you could probably make one of your law clerks do it. All I need you to do is look in your books and say “yea” or “nay” on whether or not a certain statute exists.
If you can spare about 20 minutes or less pro bono your work would be appreciated. Please e-mail me at rastahomie@hotmail.com.
Thanx.
Try here. 
Well I can tell you right now that Springfield does NOT allow that thing you did with the stripper and the farm animals…at least not within city limits. 
No charge for the advice my friend.
IANAL, Illinois or otherwise, but you might get a more eager response if you could “quid pro quo”, some of your mad professional skillz in exchange for this little bit of research.
Or you could look here:
"http://www.legis.state.il.us/ilcs/chapterlist.html
Illinois Compiled Statutes
Information maintained by the Legislative Reference Bureau
Updated through Public Act 91-954 (approved February 23, 2001). More recent laws are on this site as Public Acts soon after they become law. For information concerning the relationship between statutes and Public Acts, refer to the Guide."
etc etc etc
I don’t know any Illinois lawyers, but here’s a lawyer referral service where you can meet with a lawyer for approximately 30 minutes for around $15. Here is a list of phone numbers to contact to get pro bono work from Illinois lawyers; this appears to be based on income levels.
Good luck!