I Pit Begging for Charity

You’ve seen these people they have a can or bucket or boot or whatever and that stand near/in road intersections or in the doorways of stores pushing one charity or another.

It fucking pisses me off.

First of all - I don’t like people hanging about in the road. Crossing the road, preferably at an intersection, is perfectly OK. What I am objecting to is STANDING in the road. It’s a hazard. I don’t intend to hit anyone, but I have little faith in the driving skills of others on the road, not to mention these people only have to be distracted once to get hit. It’s stupid. It’s unsafe.

Second - I don’t give out money to strangers. How the fuck am I supposed to know if these people are legit are not? Or if they’re holding half the money for their own greedy selves? If I want to donate to charity I will do so, after making sure my money will go to those intended.

Third - why fuck are these people on EVERY CORNER? I do NOT want to get hit on every intersection between here and the grocery store, nor do I want to run a gauntlet from the car to the interior of the store.

Fourth - getting your little poppy/tag/doo-dad to “prove” I have been successfully suckered is bullshit. First, I already stated why I do not give out money to these assholes. Second, it doesn’t stop any other assholes from asking you to give again.

Fifth - it’s even more bullshit when high school kids do this. What the fuck are we teaching kids by trying to make them sell shit like this? That it’s OK to beg? That the shit they’re peddling is worth more than their safety, so go play in traffic?

One part of me thinks: “How dare people beg in an area where they are likely to receive more money!”

Another part of me empathizes with you and feels you are justified in being harangued by beggars who not only annoy, but, more importantly, endanger others by being a road hazard.

I think the latter part of me is winning the mental argument, but there’s still something about this OP that is rubbing me the wrong way.

Given the local unemployment rate I’m not sure how you can conclude my area is a place where they are “likely to receive more money!” I’m living in an economically depressed city, in a neighborhood with deteriorating infrastructure, a noticeable lack of home repairs, and every 3rd house down the road in foreclosure. This ain’t a rich suburb.

I don’t object to charity - I object to begging road hazards and harassment of people trying to do their chores.

What kinds of charities are we talking about here? Like the Salvation Army bucket brigade at Christmas type collections? Those always make me feel slightly annoyed/uncomfortable, and I won’t give them money for the reasons you stated-- I have my own charities that I donate to via the proper channels, etc. But I never see such solicitors any other time of year.

We do have people who beg for spare change, which is strongly discouraged by local businesses. I won’t give them money either, though I have been known to offer food instead.

I guess I’m wondering about the circumstances behind your OP, Broomstick. It must be different in larger cities, because I don’t see this where I am, and I’m glad.

Ach, don’t take it out on the kids. I was a girl scout once and we had fundraisers aplenty- when people began to give me a diatribe about not donating on principle, I didn’t understand a whit of it.

I have to agree with the OP. We have this here a lot and it makes me nervous. I think most of them are just scam artists. Sometimes they purport to be collecting for a charity and wear red vests and tape a pic of a starving kid to a collection bucket but it’s never a charity I ever heard of. Most of the time they just look like bums with cardboard signs saying they are starving war vets or some such, yet there is always 2 or 3 at an intersection. I do not want to be approached in my car while I’m driving. As the OP stated it makes me extremely nervous that these people might make a misstep and get hit by a car or thrown into my path. They are not by the side of the road, they are in the intersection, rarely at the side of the road, but they always start walking in between the cars when they are stopped at a light. This is just an accident waiting to happen. Driving is dangerous enough, we don’t need additional road hazards that don’t belong there. I think I remember reading that it is illegal but the police don’t have the time to really enforce it.

People do that here too, though not all that frequently. It’s annoying as hell and I’m always shocked that no one gets run over standing in the middle of the damn road like that.

Weren’t you just saying how poor you were? And just got a part time job? Have a heart for Christ’s sake. Some people need help because they really need help. Giving to charity isn’t about you, it’s about them.

Today it was Knights of Columbus.

And I do mean every single intersection they were out, multiple people knocking on the car windows.

I have also seen the Fraternal Order of Police do this, the Fireman’s Boot Brigade, and a half dozen others.

Salvation Army people do not stand in the street, they do not block doorways, and they do not harass you when you choose not to give on a particular occassion.

Ah, yes, being harassed as I walk into the grocery store - “If you can afford to buy groceries you can afford to give something!” - when I am trying to figure out how much bruised fruit I can afford to buy is really going to endear me to the charity, uh-huh! As a matter of fact I have been “one of those people who really need help” quite a bit of late, and I should not have to explain or justify that to get some over-enthusiastic charity asshole off my case so I can do the fucking grocery shopping. Seriously, he followed me from the parking lot into the store. At what point does this become over the top? When he knocks me down and goes through my pockets?

Look, you know how hard it is, I wish I could walk with you and tell people to shut the hell up. Don’t pay them no mind. I’d put my arm around you and give you a good hug, hell. There’s no accounting for how people act. Until they walk in your shoes they don’t know what it’s like. Do you need some help? I’m not well off but I just made employee of the month at my job so I have some extra dough. PM me and I’ll send you some. Try to keep your spirits up, I know it’s hard.

If I might interject and call the situation as I see it. Although I’m prolly wrong.

Broomstick is upset because che* is having a rough go at with money too, and people harassing makes them feel defensive.

When you only have a little bit of something and everyone seems to want a piece of it you’re going to want them to leave you alone because you need it for yourself.

Having to explain you only have a little and need it for yourself all the time is degrading to your dignity. Which being poor can really run into the ground anyway. I know I grew up poor.

Now on the flip side sometimes people begging really are begging because that’s their last option. Thankfully never been that poor but it could happen to anyone. As much as telling someone begging you have nothing to spare hurts your dignity, actually begging would be 10x worse.
*gender neutral version of he/she, because message boards don’t have pics of our sex organs so sometimes you don’t know.

One morning last week, I dropped my wife off at work. Driving back I had to stop at an intersection that had a vendor selling the Sun-Sentinel newspaper. He looked like he could have been homeless – dirty, emaciated, unshaven, sunburned. We made eye contact, but I shook my head and mouthed “No thank you.” He came over to my car anyway, whining “Come on, man! It’s only a buck!” I said no thanks again. He gave my bright yellow Aveo the once-over, sneered “Who the hell picked out your car’s color?” and turned around and stumped off.
I felt like phoning the paper’s distribution desk and complaining, but I didn’t want to scotch it for the vendor, who really looked destitute. My skin’s not that thin, but c’mon – if I say no, it means no, and I don’t need to be given shit for it, whatever the reason.

And my wife picked out the color, thankyouverymuch.

I can’t speak directly for Broomstick (who is female, btw, if I’m remembering her correctly from our meeting of several years ago), but from the OP I gathered she was speaking of people who are (or at least present themselves as) collecting for a charity or cause, not people who are begging for themselves. And I agree with her. Although I don’t see much of it where I am now, I remember when I lived in Chicago it wasn’t uncommon for people to be hanging around intersections and malls with cans and vests. Some of them were really pushy, practically blocking doorways and tapping on closed car windows.

In fact, when I recently visited Chicago, a friend and I were accosted by several kids wandering the parking lot selling candy to raise money for a basketball program. We almost ran over one of them trying to back out of our parking space.

Those charities are providing employment to teenagers in your area. How dare they try to employ people in an economically depressed area. Besides, the poor tend to give more to charity than the rich or middle-class.

That’s not really true. The police have the time, all they have to do is shake them down once in a while, run through ticketing people on occasion. Just enough to make people afraid to do so.

Yes, this makes me mad. The high school near me lets their athletic teams do this. Since when is standing in the median with a bucket an acceptable fundraising technique? It’s fucking awful and I have been tempted to complain to the school about it. There are a million other ways they can generate funds that might actually teach them something valuable.

On the one hand, I really dislike people in the middle of traffic asking for money. If they were on the corner on the sidewalk instead of the median or in traffic that’d be a different story. In fact, I once made a vow to give to the first charity that set up on the sidewalk, anywhere, even in a mall, and I’m sure I’ve seen them in the past couple years and not noticed but I was actively looking for a year and never saw any.

On the other hand, I misread the OP as “I pit pegging for charity,” which I’d probably prefer to median begging.

The Doper community have been very generous. I actually CAN pay my essential bills right now, it’s just that there is nothing else beyond that. I’m not in need of handouts for those basics, so I’m not accepting them, and my situation is improving, but damn it’s frustrating in the meanwhile.

I don’t want someone to give me a fish - I want a job on a fishing boat. (So to speak).

Yep - female then, female now, planning to stay that way.

Exactly.

Yep, Chicago area, check…

Last I heard Knights of Columbus uses volunteers (in other words, they ain’t payin’ nobody to do this) and the geezers I saw volunteering today haven’t been teenagers for at least 40 years.

The teenagers are invariably doing this for a sports team or band because the voters in the area are too fucking cheap to fund such things honestly - in other words, the kids aren’t getting paid, either.

I am NOT talking about the truly homeless and destitute in the thread - I’m talking about (presumably) middle class people who haven’t a fucking clue that someone not giving to Today’s Cause are not always selfish - sometimes they really don’t have anything to spare.

What?

I pine for the Psy-duck smiley from somethingawful.

There’s no sin in choosing your charity wisely. In selecting and giving to the groups who fundraise in ways you approve of.

Don’t like traffic hawkers, don’t give. Don’t like beggars on corners, don’t give.

Give to whom you do like, the salvation army kettle drive at Christmas, the church missionary fund, Kiva, Heifer, Cyclone relief.

There are too many causes for any single one to honestly believe you should give to them all.

When I get telemarketing fundraiser calls, I tell them honestly, I like your cause but I’m sorry I won’t support this form of fundraising. I feel the same about children sent out going door to door. Sorry, I don’t like it.

So I give to whom I like and don’t sweat the others. I, personally don’t mind giving to hard cases on the street, panhandlers. If I can, I give. I don’t judge what they do with the money, as others do, I suspect, so I give them a little something when I can.

As for the out in traffic, at every corner thing, it used to be a long held traditional part of frosh week at the university here in town. Then, someone got hurt and that was that, now they have a different drive, the charity still makes money, the kids spend an afternoon working for others and no one gets hurt.