Well that was boring.
I had to work all day.
I had it worse. I just clicked Refresh all day. 
I don’t like this new format one little bit. I don’t like the font, I don’t like the size, I don’t like the way it looks, I don’t like the way the titles look - other than that, I’m glad we’re back. 
Hey, other drivers - when you can see your reflection in the lanes on the road, IT’S TOO FREAKIN’ SLIPPERY TO TALK ON THE CELLPHONE WHILE DRIVING! Also, please stop tailgating me down icy hills. I’m going as fast as I can and still stay in control of my ton of steel. Have you heard of the hundreds of accidents we’ve had in town the last couple of weeks? Why don’t you go make yourself a statistic somewhere else and leave me out of it?
A handheld immersion blender will take care of that “transfer to blender” step. Just make sure you use a narrower, deeper pot to cook the soup in, as a shallow batch of soup will cause splattering if the blades hit the air.
We used to have one of them in the restaurant I worked in, except it was about the size of a jackhammer. Those things are great.
Just tell him they were good enough for his grandchildren when they were little, so they should be good enough for him.
Actually, don’t, heh.
He’d love it. (He’s my Dad, BTW, so I have some experience of this type of thing.)
I’m not even 20 yet, I should not have an old high school friend tell me upon seeing a recent picture that time has been good to me and I still look so young.
I had to have some dental work done yesterday. Bummer. So today my dentist’s office calls me to say they’ve submitted the claim to my insurance, who tells them my policy has been cancelled. So I freak. I call the insurance company, who put me through 17,805 kinds of ID checks before they confirm that yes, I still have coverage and then say they have no record of the dentist’s office contacting them for a claim. Who do I believe? I believe the dentist.
I am still shaking with anger. How many times do I have to tell you my Social Security number?
Listen up you fuckity fucks that live in corner houses. When it snows you have to shovel ALL of your sidewalk, NOT just the part in front of your house. The sides too! I know, it’s cold and it sucks outside. I wouldn’t want to double shoveling duty, either. But I did it when I lived on the corner and you have to do it too. People (and short dogs!) need to use that sidewalk and it’s fucking rude to leave it under 10 inches of snow. Shovel it or I’m going to write something rude in it.
No, tell them to shovel it, or you’ll make your dog write something rude in the snow. 
I love spices, but I kinda like stuff like this, too.
Call me jsblandgoddess
I’m considering burying some dog turds for them to find at first thaw.
Unless your dog is a Great Dane or a Newfie this really isn’t going to be quite the deterrent you might be hoping for.
However, I know someone who owns Great Danes, and for a small fee you could get a five gallon pail full of their turds for the offenders to find come the first thaw.
That’s my ongoing, seasonal peeve. It is THE LAW in Calgary that you have to clear your sidewalks down to bare concrete - if you don’t do it, the city will come and do it for you and bill you for their trouble. I had to do it for my sidewalks, and all you assholes whose sidewalk I have to try to walk on can goddamn well do it too.
MySpace rant: Look, you doof, don’t send me a message that requires an answer if you have your settings such that one has to be on your Friend’s list before you’ll accept messages, and then when I try to Friend you just so I can answer your query, I find that you don’t accept add requests from bands, so if I go to my personal, non-band account and try to Friend you, I find that I have to know either your e-mail address or your last name before you will accept the add request. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION???
Hmmm… My neighbors have a Great Dane. I wonder if it’s less weird to sneak over with a bucket and steal their dog poop or ask them for it…
My vote is the delete button.
I sliced my fucking index finger open.
Cutting bacon. Why do you hate me, bacon?
No, it was a legitimate query that deserved an urgent (as in timely, asap) answer, but I’m sure they didn’t realize their settings were going to be an obstacle. I spent well over an hour trying to get back to them. I even went through their Friends list trying to find someone to send the answer to but either their profiles were set to private and they wouldn’t accept messages either, or they hadn’t logged in for a awhile. I finally found someone in Spain who had logged in this morning and whose profile would accept messages. I explained the problem and asked if they would please forward the answer to the person. I’m keeping my fingers crossed.