Atomic sez:
Only minus 14 when I drove to work this a.m. But that was on the west side, where I live … east side, where I work, is something like minus 20.
I find it hard to believe that we’ll ever get out of the hoarfrost and into the green … 
Hey Creepy Guy In My Hall,
We’re all really happy you got pubes. But really, you can refrain from leaving them all of the toilet seat ANY TIME NOW.
Please stop talking to me,
QoT
Whoops, missed edit. That’s “all OVER the toilet seat.”
Speak for yourself - I’M not really happy he got pubes.
Hey, dipshit – stop shovelling the snow on your driveway onto the fucking street! Put it on your yard like everyone else and stop contributing to the ice rinkification of our roads. It’s times like these when I actually have feelings of nostalgia for my time spent in Kitchener, Ontario, where they plow every single street after every single snowfall and fine people who try to shovel their shit back onto the streets.
Speaking of shoveling the snow onto the road and the city not plowing, the major road in our neighbourhood was down to one frickin’ lane today. That’s right, the MAJOR road, and ONE frickin’ lane. Cars had to wait for cars going the other way to drive down the road. There were a bunch of schoolbuses taking up half of the road on one side, and cars parked six feet from the curb on the other side (because of the snow). I don’t know how in hell this can be acceptable.
Now, my rant du jour - my dentist implied I was a liar not once, but twice today. I think that’s a new record. I have a tooth that I think is cracked under the filling - I felt it go when I bit down on something hard. I have a tooth beside the one that hurts that is also cracked, but it doesn’t hurt at all. The dentist is convinced that the cracks he can see are causing the pain, even though that tooth doesn’t hurt at all. Oh well; he’s fixing both, so we’ll find out. He thinks the painful tooth will just be checking under the filling; I think it will be a root canal and crown. I hope he’s right.
The second time was when I told him that the sedation he gave me last time made me barf. Apparently he’s never heard of that before - the only way that would happen was if I ate when I wasn’t supposed to (the medication given for sedation is an anti-nausea medicine). I didn’t eat; I barf when I get sedated; that’s my thing. I barfed for about four hours after a laparoscopy. I guess my dentist subscribes to the Dr. House school of medicine - patients lie.
Dear You-Know-Who-You-Are
I hope you never figure it out, you little shit.
(Actually, you probably don’t know who you are. You’re that fucking stupid.)
Dear Lightspeed Panel,
I want all the goddamned points you guys owe me for filling out lots of online surveys. You endlessly lecture me about taking my time to fill them out carefully and thoughtfully. Fine. But that means not getting petty. That means not deciding that I am not entitled to to the two hundred points I was promised because I only took nine minutes to fill out a survey you believe should have taken me ten minutes. At this point I am owed about fifty bucks in points, money I think I will never ever see.
You are cheap creeps and will come to a no good end.
Sincerely,
Disgusted
Asstard in the pickup truck in front of me the other afternoon: If you want to text message on your cell phone, pull the <bleep> over into one of the many subdivisions around here and do so. Instead you decided to prove you could multi-task by driving down the two-lane road (no passing allowed), weaving all over the place, at 25 mph in a 40 mph zone. The polite (later not-so-polite) honking of the three cars that were stuck behind you apparently couldn’t penetrate your fog of intense concentration.
I’m assuming he was texting because I could see that he was looking down and to the right, with only occassional glances at the road. Why is there never a cop when you need one?
My dishwasher took a chunk of skin off the tip of my finger. The lower rack has slid out and almost hit the floor several times as aell and I don’t know why it hates me so damn much
Short. Fucking. Cord. Instructions.
(aka…To assure your continued convenience and safety, all small appliances now have two-foot long power cords.)