When a mosquito bites you are you just glad you could provide a meal to the poor bugger?
Superintelligent groundhogs messing with your ride?
DO WHAT MUST BE DONE!
elucidator:
Have you daughters? As well as a wife? Could be another tragic case of testicular defenestration. That’s right, right out the window.
Like this cousin of mine, man’s man, Marine Corps, always seemed to work the conversation around to how tough he was, you know the type. Couldn’t wait for whatever season so he could kill whatever that season was. Damn good shot, too, saw him plug a sparrow with a .30-.30, just to show us he could.
Well, then he got married, which was a pretty good idea, over all, kind of sanded off some of the sharp edges. I could even drink with him some, discuss our…differing viewpoints…for as much as twenty, thirty minutes before he’d casually mention how easily he could maim me. An improvement.
But then came children, three of them, all daughters. The collective influence gradually just wore him down. We go fishing, he’d use lures, couldn’t deal with live bait. Started to share his feelings. Verbally, I mean. We go out to the deer lease, he couldn’t hit a thing, always seem to just barely miss. Couldn’t shoot a deer if he was close enough to kick him in the ass.
Got four daughters now, showers at the Y, pees outside on a tree, doesn’t remember what his bathroom looks like inside.
'Course, I thought I heard tell you were married, but this only applies to men with daughters and wives, so this may not have any bearing at all. Gotta be pretty well outnumbered for the creeping wussification effect to set in. And even if true, there’s no real cure anyway. Forget I mentioned it.
Sniff,
This story reminds me of that Toyota (or is it a Nissan?) commercial in which a Pendleton wearing lumberjack man is performing incredible feats of masculinity (catching a salmon with his bar hands in a stream, loading a large tree stump single handed into the back of the pickup, etc), until the announcer talks about his wife and two little daughters; showing the Lumberjack man’s softer side.
Tannim
July 15, 2008, 9:12pm
124
Did you think of giving them a peace offering? Maybe something chocolate flavored?Chocolate ex-lax as an afternoon treat.
Just don’t do what this guy did…
A clean shot through the skull does not torture make.
“That groundhog’s Dynamite…!” :eek:
Groundhog leather makes excellent shoelaces, by the way.
ouryL
July 16, 2008, 9:23pm
129
Achren
July 16, 2008, 10:31pm
130
Gukumatz:
Some people can’t even following neon roadsigns to “Getting It.”
(I’ll re-iterate my question from last page - anyone have access to the original? If someone has it in a .doc somewhere, I’d be very grateful for an e-mail! :))
I tried to send you a PM and got this message:
The following errors occurred when this message was submitted:
Anyway, I’ve got a version of it (.html, not .doc). It’s not great, quite a few names have been replaced by “Guest”, but if you don’t mind I can email it along.
A 15 year old is a man-child. More responisble than a 10 year old, but surely not mature enough to make a comittment to combat, be it as a soldier or an “enemy combatant”, whatever.
I don’t get it, I just flat out don’t understand it.
Scylla
July 16, 2008, 11:54pm
132
elucidator:
A 15 year old is a man-child. More responisble than a 10 year old, but surely not mature enough to make a comittment to combat, be it as a soldier or an “enemy combatant”, whatever.
I don’t get it, I just flat out don’t understand it.
Maybe that’s because you’re in the wrong thread, Batman.
Is he? How long do groundhogs live?
Okay, that made me laugh way more than it should have.
