…stating that someone has complained that my animals(s) is annoying one or more of my neighbors by its noi2e, i.e., barking, yelping, crowing, or other loud noises. <insert assorted King County ordinances, including punishments of up to $1000 and/or imprisonment for up to 90 days for continued violations.>
I don’t have any animals, unless you count a bunch of Sea Monkeys™. I do however have a number of children, and they have been know to pretend to be dogs, cats, cheetahs, elephants, bears, lions, and many other assorted wild and domesticated animals.
I have no idea who this letter was meant for, as no neighbor has ever approached me personally, nor left a note on my door, car, or any other written personal attempt to contact me, nor called me, nor any other indication that there is or ever has been a problem with these pets I do not have.
In fact, I have never noticed any neighbor dogs barking - at least since the yutz behind me stopped leaving his two yappy poodles outside 24/7. Now THAT was a problem. And he stopped at least 9 months ago.
I think I will call King County on Monday morning and inform them of the error. Maybe they’ll laugh. Goodness knows my nearest neighbors (none of whom have dogs either, but one is a police officer) laughed a lot when I showed them the official notice.