There’s a little lump down there and it hurts, especially when I sit down 
Is there some off-the-counter medication I could take? I live in the UK.
You may want to see a doc to confirm the diagnosis. If you have a hemorrhoid with a clot in it, topical treatment won’t help much. If it’s a fissure or a fistula, those treatment differs from that of a noncomplicated hemorrhoid.
While waiting to see your doc, you generally can’t go wrong by using hot soaks, and the over-the-counter painkiller of your choice, along with fiber supplements.
QtM, MD
Inflatable Rubber Donuts.
Inflatable rubber donuts are your friends.
Tip: Inflatable rubber donuts are not for eating.
[funny story hijack] The head of the mail room where I went to college was an openly and flamboyantly gay man. A girlfriend and I were chatting with him and getting our mail; she had slipped on an icy sidewalk and fallen on her butt. She was given one of the aforementioned rubber donuts for her bruised tailbone. While chatting, the mail guy asked her how her weekend was, and almost immediately noticed the donut in her hand. “Oh, fine” she replied, and then noticed his quizzical eyes on the donut. “Butt pad?” she offered, jokingly. “Oh, my weekend wasn’t that good!” he said gravely.
Like Qagdop said, go see a doctor. In the meantime, take some Sitz baths. Dry off well afterwards.
My doctor prescribed me hydrocortizone suppositories that sometimes helped, and sometimes didn’t, but the pharmacist did say that you can get them without a prescription. Preparation H didn’t help me at all.
If they are itchy, you can wipe with a witch hazel pad, available at the drugstore. The itch is from the area getting dirty, and not cleaning it well due to the pain.
Lie on your stomach as much as you can. Any other position puts wait on your rear end, aggravating the 'roid. From the reading I did when my first one emerged, avoid the rubber donut. It increases blood flow to the area.
The pain should be reduced in about seven days. If it isn’t, make an appointment to see a doctor. But you’ve done that already, haven’t you?
In the future, eat a lot of fiber, don’t sit on the toilet until you really have to go, and never, ever strain to move your bowels.
When I had hemorrhoids, I was never given the “don’t strain” advice but it does make sense. Mine bled (and still do from time to time) and I was told to use Preparation H and to take OTC stool softeners.
But you also don’t want to go too soft. If you get diarrhea, it also strains the muscles.
This is a pretty good overview.
Could the problem be caused from the squats/deadlifts I do? Anyway, I found a cream called Anusol at my local ASDA. There’s no way I am going to see a doctor for this, unless that cream does nothing.
Well, my first one came out after I injured my back SCUBA diving, so weightlifting could be your culprit.
I really recommend that you see a doctor, though. They do come in different levels of pain (mine was about as bad as it can be, I think), but you’ll want to start a paper trail in case you ever want to get them removed. My doctor won’t do it until I have a history of them recurring, because of the horrible pain associated with the surgery. (as he said to me, imagine what it feels like to inject novocaine into something that already hurts that much!)
I assure you that your doctor has seen a butt before. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, and he/she might even be able to relieve the pain. Go to the doctor!
Do not taunt inflatable rubber donut.