I want to play Dungeons and Dragons with the people in the advertisment.

VCO3, I wonder something, and hope you’ll forgive me for the wondering. It sounds as if you’re looking for a group of pretty stable, even-keeled people to play with. Your board persona often comes across as someone who keeps the volume turned up to 11 and who gets a bit of pleasure out of saying shocking things, just to see how people respond to the shock. Look at the second paragraph of your OP, an OP guaranteed to attract gamers, in which you insult gamers.

If the question is whether it’s a hopeless dream for you specifically to play with attractive, even-keeled people, it seems to me that, absent a major difference between your board persona and your off-board persona, the answer would be yes.

Have you taken that into consideration? Unless you can show a more diplomatic side to the even-keeled gamers, they’re likely to shun you in favor of gaming with other even-keeled gamers, leaving you to game with the trolls and troglodytes.


Not necessarily something to be smug about. Are they Southwest flight attendants?

Re: identifying fellow gamers in non-gaming settings:

I’ve had the best luck personally by doing some subtle things that let those ‘in the know’ identify me as a gamer, without coming across as Comic-Book Guy. This is how I met my current group, which isn’t quite the commercial but is definitely not an ATHF group (I had to Google ATHF, if that gives you a clue).

Anyway, it wasn’t easy finding a mature group. The easy ones to find are precisely the ones you don’t really want to hang with. I found that letting them find me was easier than looking myself, but for that, you have to advertise, kinda. Without being annoying. There’s a few ways, but subtlety is key.

The most successful so far has been my license plate frame, actually. You can get these made pretty cheap (look for kiosks in the mall around Christmastime). Mine simply says “Alumni - Miskatonic University”. Only the people who I want to get it get it, everyone else just assumes that M. U. is the real deal.

(It’s really funny when someone is totally whooshed and starts saying something like “Oh, I heard of that school. My cousin went there!”. Snrk!)

At work, I’ve got a couple printouts of funny strips from Ctrl-Alt-Del and Knights of the Dinner Table up in my cube. Again, those in the know get it, those who aren’t, don’t. No fuss, no muss.

The people you’re looking for are good at flying under the radar. They have to be – if they weren’t, they’d be the socially inept nerds you don’t want to hang out with anyway. :slight_smile: So keep your eyes open and look for the subtle stuff.

Or Air India? :slight_smile:

Our group of five are all 30-somethings (a few closing on 40), college-educated, who own their homes.

Married/father of two/doctor/male
Married/no children/high-level corporate manager/male
Single/no children/web developer/male
Single/no children/not sure of his exact job/male
Married/no children/writer/female (me)
Married/no children/senior web developer/male (husband)

Everyone bathes daily. Everyone puts their adult responsibilities first. No one lives with their parents. Everyone is perfectly normal. If you want to add in the other four players we used to have:

Married/no children/web developer/male (though not married at the time)
Married/father of one/mid-level tech manager/male
Married/father of two/programmer/male (though he wasn’t married w/children when he played)
Married/no children/not sure of her job/female (wife of the corp. manager above)

BioWare, not Blizzard. Sorry, I got them mixed up. I knew it started with a B… (can you tell I’m not much of a computer gamer?)

Sounds like my group. We are all oddball, but none of us fit the usual gamer/SCAdian mold. We wash, dress professionally, and have rather wide ranging interests. Hell, none of us even have traditional geek careers.

Myself, 29, financial statistician.
My incredibly hot wife, 26, artist & homemaker.
My grad school pal, 26, law student & political philosophy PhD candidate.
His very attractive girlfriend, 26, law student.
Husband of a fellow grad student, late twentysomething, investment banker.
Mutual friend of ours, early thirties, attorney.

We don’t smoke weed, we don’t eat cheetos, and by the grace of fucking god, we do not shoot the darkness with magic missiles.

I’m a D&D player, but relatively new at it. Could you explain this one to me?

Nothing strictly to do with D&D. It is a Lovecraft reference.

By some definitions, “nerd” is anyone who plays D&D, which makes your request impossible. Why is it so important that your gaming group look a certain way? When I go trekking, I look for a certain type of person. When I play Settlers of Catan, I look for a different type of person. Sometimes they overlap, often they don’t. If someone is relaxing to play with and can give you a good game, does it really matter if they are a pot-smoking trekkie who participates in “Greedo shot first” SDMB threads?

Um, Greedo is Star Wars. Sheesh.

That’s only something newbies do. Experienced people know that you should attack the darkness with Melf’s Acid Arrow.


Excellent point. Melf’s Acid Arrow requires a ranged touch attack, which means you can do it on a square instead of on a target, which means you don’t need to be able to see where you’re shooting it (although you’ll still suffer the 50% miss chance, although if you have blindfight you can roll it twice), whereas magic missile can only be cast on one or more creatures, which means you must be able to see the creatures to even attempt the spell, indicating that oh my god I really am that guy.


My current roleplaying group consists of me, a 29-year-old bank employee, two 25-year-old students (one musical genius and one computer whiz), and a 33-year-old optometrist. We’re all geeks, but you wouldn’t know from looking at us.

If I may add something: I roleplayed intensely from the mid-80s to the mid-90s. Then I didn’t play at all for ten years. Playing with bright adults is a completely different thing. People who actually think about what their characters might do in a certain situation and who care about what happens, as opposed to charging as many orcs as possible… It’s great.

Ah, thanks. By spooky coincidence, “Herbert West - Reanimator” was mentioned just the other day in the Something Positive webcomic.

I gotta admit - I wonder if you’re being whooshed. **VC03 **tends to launch threads and stir the pot without re-engaging. You guys have taken his request seriously and offered great insights, seeking to help a potential new enthusiast.

But I wonder if the OP is not about sincere interest, but instead a cynical commentary on how unrealistic he perceives the commercial to be?

VC03, if I have that wrong and you genuinely want to start gaming, I apologize…

I am not a gamer myself, but do participate in activities where finding the right group who have the skills AND the personality to work together is really, really hard - but entirely worth it when a good team is assembled…

Just lie down until the feeling goes away.

A Lovecraft reference in SP isn’t a spooky coincidence, it’s a statistical certainty.

Man, I totally want to sit in on a Left Hand of Dorkness gaming session. Stupid huge distances separating people.

If you make it to Gencon, I might be able to hook you up with a game my brother’s running there :).