I got a check in the mail from my credit card company a few weeks ago for $15. Immediately suspicious, I read the fine print, and found out that by depositing it, I was signing up for some service that charges almost 1% of my balance each month for some “credit protection” idiocy.
Ah, but wait. I get the first month totally free. Well, that should be plenty of time to cancel it. I deposit the check, and about two weeks later, I get an informational packet in the mail, just gushing with all of the protection my credit will now receive. It takes about 1 minute to find the customer service phone number, and another two on hold before I speak to a person
Credit Card Company Wage Slave: Can I have your account number please?
iamthewalrus(:3=: xxxx-xxxx-xxxx-xxxx
CCCWS: And what can I help you with?
iamthewalrus(:3=: I’d like to cancel this Credit Protector thingy.
CCCWS: Is there any particular reason?
iamthewalrus(:3=: Nope.
CCCWS: Are you aware that you have 9 specific benefits that–
iamthewalrus(:3=: Don’t care, just cancel it, please.
CCCWS: Would you be interested if we lowered your rate to 0.49%?
iamthewalrus(:3=: Nope. Just cancel it please.
CCCWS: Ok, you’ll receive confirmation in the mail in a few weeks.
iamthewalrus(:3=: Thank you.
Total elapsed time: 5 minutes, 20 seconds.
And this is the second time they’ve done this in the last 4 months. I can’t wait for their next brilliant scheme to pay me $15.