I vaguely remember reading a time-travel or sci-fi story where a guy manages to hit everyone in the world in the back of the head at the same time, as a sort of massive prank or vengeance. Does anyone know what this is?
Never heard of it, but it sounds AWESOME!
–FCOD
Isnt that in Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, or one of it’s sequels? Except I think he just wanted to insult everyone who had ever lived, not smack them upside the head.
And he didn’t want to do it to everyone at the same time.
And he didn’t use time travel to accomplish his goal; he was just very long-lived.
But other than that, the resemblance is clear.
Life the Universe and Everything has the immortal time traveler who is insulting the universe alphabetically.
Don’t know what VC03 is thinking of though.
Well, if you go back far enough in time, hitting everybody in the world in the back of the head can be pretty easy, at least if you subscribe to an Adam and Eve type of creation story.
“Hey Adam!”
“?”
Whack “Ha-Ha!”
No, he was definitly a time traveller. He was also immortal, which is how he had enough subjective time to do it, but he would need a time machine to get enough objective time to insult everyone. Otherwise, folks would keep dying before he could get around to them.
Yeah, this story was just a short story and I’m pretty sure the guy was thumping everyone in the back of the head at the same time. It might not have been time travel, though - maybe it was some sort of teleportation.
You’re all referring to Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged. Since he came by his immortality through an industrial accident, and not naturally, he wasn’t mentally equipped to deal with it, hence the insulting everyone in alphabetical order. He did make a mistake and insulted Arthur Philip Dent twice though.
No they’re not, Wowbagger wasn’t a time traveller and he didn’t whack people in the back of the head.
I know exactly the story you are referring to! I think I may have it in a book at home and will look it up if I get the chance.
The guy who wants to do the hitting is a mean SOB, and the main focus of the story is some sort of weird, backwoods hick family of aliens, right?
Yes, Miller, Indistinguishable, & NAF1138 were talking about Wowbagger. I’m pretty sure you’re right that he wasn’t a time traveller though - when he showed up at the cricket match 6 million years after insulting Arthur Philip Dent, he was there to insult Arthur Philip Depper or something like that.
I thought (in the books) Wowbagger got multiply reincarnated, and not necessarily in a chronological order. It turns out he was the whale with the bowl of petunias that said “oh no, not again”. Or am I misremembering?
You’re thinking of Agrajag, who was the bowl of petunias.
That is TOTALLY it. I forgot the whole “redneck aliens” aspect. What IS it?!
No, he had to time travel, because he was insulting them all in alphabetical (not cronological) order. So he was skipping around in time to make sure he got it right.
Arther Phillip Dayodat was the wrong person I think (I know this has nothing to do with the actual thread anymore. Sorry to the OP.)
I don’t remember anything about him time traveling. Adams wrote that Wowbagger’s task was futile and he knew it; the point was that he had forever to waste and was mad at the universe. If he was time traveling, the task wouldn’t have taken forever.
Wow. Now I’m really curious. Can’t wait to find out the answer. This story sounds hilarious.
thwartme
Huh, you might be right. Now I need to look when I get home.
As Marley23 said: Yes, he was doing alphabetical order. No, he didn’t time travel. Yes, that means he couldn’t possibly get it right. To quote the book,