Identify this Steven Wrightish comedian.

Yeah, that’s him.

*Sometimes I’ll throw one in there and then go on vacation.

I got a king size bed. I don’t know any kings, but I guess if one came over, he would be comfortable. "Oh, you are a king, you say? Well you will never believe what I have in store for you! It is to your exact specifications. I did not know you guys were all the same size. I think I can set your old lady up too!*

Mitch is doing commercials for Jimmy John’s sandwiches now.

My roommate says, “I need to shave and use the shower. Does anyone need to use the bathroom?” It’s like some weird-ass quiz where he reveals the answer first…

I don’t think he was. Mitch has been periodically popular on the late night shows for about some ten years now. (exact date of national TV exposure?) And he has recently been featured on Comedy Central. You might be thinking of that neanderthal looking guy from LCS-II who did quips, non sequiturs, and one liners. Sorry, I can’t recall his name.

I think that’s what he meant.

I always assume there’s someone in the world shaving right now, so when I have to shave, I say, “I’m going to go shave, too.”

I don’t have a girlfriend. But there is this one girl who’d be really mad if she heard me say that.

I would like to have a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. The mailman would get shot to death, the envelope would not seal, and the stamp was in the wrong denomination. The last payment must be made in wampum.

  • I think pringles’ originaly intention was to make tennis balls, but on the day the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truck of potatos arrived. And pringels is a laid back company so they said “fu*k it, cut em’ up.” * :slight_smile:

Jack London

Aaaarrrghhh!!

Four days ago I had to cancel my tickets to Mitch’s November Philly show for a class reunion! This thread is mocking me!

Jay London

Jack London does jokes about wolves.

Some of them are real howlers too.

Before the puns go too fur, canine get in on this? (Oh my, did I just throw us for a lupus?)

I don’t know if puns are okay. Alaska mod.

Hedberg was on an episode of “That '70s Show” in the first season. He was the proprietor of the Hub, the junk-food place where the kids hang out. “I did not lose a leg in Vietnam so I could serve nachos to you kids!” “Hank, you weren’t in Vietnam.” “I said, I did not lose a leg in Vietnam!”

I hoped he’d become a recurring character, but unfortunately, he did not. They probably thought his style was too abrasive or something. Or maybe it was the drinking problem that’s been mentioned upthread. BTW, KidCharlemagne, is his hair black now? I thought it was always dark blond.