No, and I’m not sure how that changes what I said in my last post about the difference between dreams and expectations? That is a genuine question, I am posting in this thread because I would like to discuss and understand the situation.
Sorry, lavenderviolet argued that upthread, I should have quoted (bolding not mine):
that’s the part I didn’t understand (and again, I should have just quoted). but that seems to be what’s in implied in Guinastasia story, that the kid was upset because they didn’t get this specific request. If your take is that Ben didn’t upset the kid, he just missed an opportunity to make them happier, then we agree on this point.
I thought I explained it in my last post. Most of the time as a kid, if you want something, you hope you get it, you try to get it if that’s possible, and that’s pretty much the end of it - it happens or it doesn’t. On the other hand, if you’re very sick and your health has been in jeopardy for a long time, or you’re terminally ill, it can make a much greater difference. Kids in that kind of position are in much greater need of some cheering up.
I haven’t really opined on that one way or the other because I think we’re missing some details. My position at the start of the thread was that if he routinely turns these requests down because he doesn’t care about the happiness of the kids, he’s acting like an asshole. But I don’t know if that’s specifically the case with him.
Okay I agree with that but saying “X will make Sally really really happy” is not the same as “Sally will be really really upset if X doesn’t happen”. That was my point.
Well this is where we’re just not going to agree. In my mind an asshole NFL player is someone who has been arrested for drunk driving, doing a hit and run, dogfighting, beating his girlfriend, yadda yadda yadda. Again, it’s a subjective term.
Sorry…I wasn’t clear enough. MR = mentally retarded (or developmental delay if you want to be more PC). There was no way that was a charitable gesture by the kid - it was the parents taking advantage of the charity.
There’s hundreds of charities and worthwhile causes that can make that claim on a pro athlete. While Make a Wish is a worthwhile charity, so are many others. It is unreasonable to make an arbitrary decree that this one charity is the benchmark for which all people are deemed worthy. Yes, sick and dying kids are a worthy cause. So are big brother and big sisters. And pet adoptions. And environmental causes. And literacy. If an athlete chooses to spend their time doing some charitable work, I’m certainly not going to second guess his or her choice.
All that means is that aunt and uncle have a different range of definitions than cousin. An aunt or uncle can be through marriage. A cousin, like a mother or father or sister or brother, can’t be through marriage alone. (Leaving aside qualified situations, like “step” or “adoptive.”)
I did mention this in my first post. I don’t think most people are aware of it, but as it turns out Make A Wish has a broader mission and is really generous. I’m glad your child is healthy.
Thanks, Freudian Slit and Marley23 (noting your locations, it might be interesting to note that his “wish” took us to New York City!)
That said, and relevant to the thread:
If you child is eligible, and you chose to participate (and I resisted for a LONG time thanks in part to the stigma of MaW well-represented in this thread), then the MaW people (all of whom are volunteers) work very closely with you and your child to sort out what sorts of things the kid is interested in, what’s realistic, and then work behind the scenes to liase with whomever you are going to visit with.
In our case, the kid’s first wish was to “meet Led Zeppelin”. They wrote that down, and he was made aware that his second wish would be more likely. It was, and that’s what we did, but it hardly makes Led Zeppelin de facto assholes! As a further example, a lot of kids wish to hang out with Hannah Montanna and (then) President Bush–both of whom ALONE are on a four-year waiting list for MaW due to very high demand. (We were also informed, in casual conversation, that Johnny Depp is great with MaW and has spent entire days with children.)
ETA: And I’d also like to use the anonymous-yet-public forum to give support to the Chi Omega sorority who does all of the fundraising for Make-a-Wish; the efforts of our local chapter funded the entire thing.
Meh, I still consider them cousins. (Particularly my cousin Marc’s wife, since they’ve been together since they were fifteen) We’re a pretty close family, (keep your minds out of the gutter, people!), I consider T family, and that’s that. Period.
At any rate, like I said in the other thread, THAT WAS JUST ONE SAMPLE OF BEN BEING AN ASSHOLE! Yeesh.
