If my novel is too sexually explicit, will it be rejected?

Cafe Society
1

I’m writing a novel. Actually I’ve been working on it for a very long time now and while I think I have a good story, I’m concerned there might be a particular stumbling block to getting it published. And that is to say that there is a very explicit moment in the novel that might push it into the realm of porn.

Basically, it’s a coming-of-age/self-discovery story. The main character is a shy, lonely young man who has never had a girlfriend. He meets a girl and things progress very quickly- in short order she is giving him a blowjob and he unexpectedly ejaculates on her face. She loves it and he loves that she loves it because he was expecting her to be shocked or upset.

Now this scene is not just in there for shock value or explicitness or anything like that. It actually does relate to the plot in that he’s conflicted over whether or not he wants to be with her and part of the conflict is knowing that most girls won’t willingly, much less enthusiastically, take a load on the face. She’s prepared to fulfill any fantasy for him and he of course wants to explore this fascinating new part of his life. And of course, exploring it means exploring it- writing in at least some detail about what they are doing and how they feel about it.

However, I’m worried an editor might get to that part in the story and throw it in the trash. But I don’t know for sure. I know I’ve read some very explicit things in novels you could find in any bookstore. I’ve read some things that are so disgusting it makes me wonder how they ever got published in the first place (there’s a fine example in Trainspotting). But perhaps these are established authors whose leeway is tied to their ability to make money for their publishing houses.

I know I should really just concentrate on getting the story finished and start the long, tortured journey of trying to get it over the transom and into someone’s slush pile, where they will hopefully find it a good read in general and won’t take offense to the scene in question. But it is a valid concern that an editor might automatically dismiss the story because of a scene like this?

2

I know nothing of the industry, but I don’t think it’d be a offhand dismissal unless it was really out-of-place or if your novel feels like it’s aimed at young audiences.

I’ve seen pretty graphic sex in debut novels before. Mileage may vary.

3

Have you read any novels lately?

I don’t mean that to sound as snarky as it probably does. There are novels that don’t call themselves erotica that nonetheless have VERY explicit scenes.

For some editors, instead of a reason to throw them in the trash, it’s a reason to sign the author up.

If they don’t like your sex scene and love the rest of the novel, the editor will make that clear.

In my case, they always wanted more sex.

I do see a potential plot problem, though. If he’s a shy, lonely, inexperienced young man, why does he think most girls won’t take it in the face? If the whole plot hinges on him wanting this one girl only because of this one thing, then it’s weak.

Most submissions don’t get read past the first five to ten pages. An editor isn’t going to throw it out for one scene, no matter what the scene is.

4

Go read some cheap paperback romance novels (you know, the “bodice ripper” type). What you’re describing isn’t all that different, only with less flowery language.

5

Great story. Publishers will be fighting for it. But you need to make that scene the climax (sorry) of the story. So find some other stuff to put in around, keep it tame to increase the shock value, and cash in on that money shot. There will be in a bidding war. Make sure it appeals to teens. Their parents won’t be able to resist buying a copy to see what they don’t want their kids to find out about.

I am quite serious.

6

Well, no actually, hence the topic. I’m mostly a sci-fi and Tom Clancy reader. Tom Clancy attempted a sex scene in one of his novels once. The reader will never again be able to see the words “Japanese sausage” without cringing. So in the narrow scope of what I read, sex scenes tend to be short and very non-explicit. Eric Van Lustbader will write three page long sex scenes (several of them in any given novel) but they are very technical and written in an overly flowery manner. But he’s kind of a ninja-fantasy writer, so his stuff is not exactly mainstream either. I’m sure many characters in many novels have all kinds of sex, I just wasn’t sure if this was taking it too far.

Good to hear. I don’t want the scene to be misinterpreted as him trying to dominate or humiliate her. In essence, it’s a premature ejaculation as his impression is that that is where sex tends to end. With this girl, it’s only the beginning.

Well, it’s a bit more than that. Basically, he has attempted suicide and she is his therapy, although he doesn’t exactly know this at first. It’s not so much that he thinks most girls won’t do it, it’s that he thinks they won’t do it for him (and in the case of the other girl he likes, he’s exactly right). So when she does it on the first date, it makes a lasting impression.

Actually, I kind of thought I was going to have the opposite problem. Considering what she does for him (not just the facial, she figures out his fantasies and fulfills them all, sometimes several at a time) and how willingly she does it, why would he even want to consider another girl at all? But I am incorporating this into the story. She’s too perfect and he can tell something is wrong. I’m also avoiding making her into a Mary Sue. She has exactly one specialty and that is her sexual skills. The male protagonist is going through continued emotional turmoil and the only thing she can ever think of to do is to suck his dick. So she’s great for pleasure but not for support, hence the conflict.

Exactly and I want those first pages to count. Thus far, it opens with the suicide attempt, a brief period of convalescence, meeting the girl, becoming intimate with her and then money shot. For the clean version I cut this scene off just beforehand- they’re outside, she kisses him with clear intent and then says “Let’s go inside.” But I think it works better to show rather than to tell.

:dubious:

Thus far, it ends with the character figuring out what is going on and deciding to accept it, realizing that a life of fulfilled fantasies beats the alternative. So I can’t put the money shot at the end. It’s in chapter one and it sets up the story.

7

While I don’t think the specific scene you described in the OP would be a dealbreaker, it sounds like this novel is basically porn. The plot you’ve described seems like just an excuse for a series of sex scenes. There’s definitely a market for porn, but if I were a publisher who didn’t specialize in erotic fiction then I don’t think I’d be interested in a book about a guy who has all his sexual fantasies fulfilled by a woman with “exactly one specialty”.

8

This sets off alarm bells. Not because there’s anything wrong with being a sci-fi and Tom Clancy reader, but because you’re writing a book that doesn’t seem to be the type of book you like to read. If you don’t enjoy reading coming-of-age stories about shy young men, then its going to be very hard for you to write one that will appeal to people who do.

9

It won’t automatically disqualify you for most adult markets, though it may be a bit much for a YA novel (though not necessarily). Don’t be concerned about it: if the novel is good enough, the scene won’t matter.

If the editor loves the book, but hates that one particular scene, he or she will discuss how to rewrite it to make it work better.

10

Not necessarily. A novel I read recently (1632, by Eric Flint) had a completely-explicit sex scene in it, and neither of the characters involved was the main character (though probably in the top 10 characters or so), and the sex scene was almost completely incidental to the main plot (except in that the marriage of the two characters was symbolic of a merging of cultures). It was about as far as you could get from being the climax of the book (that being a big battle many chapters later).

11

This, exactly.

12

How’s that one doing in sales?

13

“…it was a grand penis”

I can’t be the only one that was thinking that.

14

Well enough that Baen is still paying him to write the series, nine books later. The sales numbers for that specific volume might be thrown off, though, by it being available from the Baen Free Library.

15

Well, what I have described here isn’t the full story, just one important part of it. Not all the intimate encounters have to (or will) be chronicled in detail. It suffices for the reader to know that if he wants to do something (or repeat something they’ve already done) she’s down for it.

There are both sci-fi and techno-thriller aspects to this story but rather than writing what I like, I’m writing what I know. And I know well what it was like to grow up as an emotionally confused, sexually deprived teenager. While the story certainly has its share of guns, gadgets and beautiful women in leather skirts and tight sweaters it’s still by and large the story of a character’s journey. Plus a little tiny bit of explicit sex. If I wanted a story about how the brave men and women of the 303rd Logistical Studies Unit destroyed the enemy through a combination of determination, high technology and impressive firepower I could just reach over to the bookshelf and pick it up. The influences will be apparent to anyone who has read Clancy or John Varley or Heinlein but the story is very much my own.

16

Then, by all means carry on. And if that’s the sort of story it is, the sex probably won’t feel out of place.

17

Also, although that scene was explicit it was totally consensual. The woman was nervous, because of how she’d been abused as a camp follower, but her new husband had offered her the option of waiting until she was “ready”, and that made her love him.