If the federal government had an NCAA Tournament pool

Just some random blasts on how I think this would shake out if the government was like every other office and had people filling out brackets this week. Feel free to add yours.

If the federal government had an NCAA Tournament pool…

George W. Bush would have Dick Cheney make all his picks for him.

Dick Cheney would not allow anyone to see his picks, but assure everyone once the tournament was over that he was in fact the winner.

Tom Ridge, upon having all his Final Four picks eliminated, would raise the terror alert to RED and have the Final Four cancelled.

John Ashcroft would try and press gambling charges against everyone who participated.

Ari Fleischer would hold press conferences to gloat every time one of his upsets came through.

Tom Daschle would criticize all of Bush’s picks, then copy his bracket verbatim an hour before the first game.

James Traficant would demand the right to enter from prison.