If you were a haunted house...

This question is inspired from the viewing of many movies, good and bad, containing a wide variety of haunted houses…

If you were a haunted house, what methods would you use to haunt people?

You’re goal does not need to be making the people leave the house, nor killing them, nor making them stay. It can be whatever you want.

You’re abilities include (but are not limited to) the power to move around any objects inside/parts of the house, creating noises, and causing illusions. In addition to this, any other abilities you think a haunted house ought to have you may use.

Be creative. Have fun. Scare.

Any man that set foot inside my walls: I’d whisper in his ear “I’m pregnant,” all night long.

Just thinking about those words gives me the shivers.

Oh, and I’d make candlesticks float across the room.


I figure you have to go with either possessing some of the visitors or creating illusionary duplicates of them. This way the visitors won’t be able to trust each other.

Figured this would be a good thread for my “demonic” post (#666).

I love to give advice, an urge I stifle most of the time given that most people are fairly adverse to unsolicited advice (perfectly understandable, btw)

So I’d follow various residents of the house around and tell them what they were doing wrong.

“You don’t expect the dishes to get clean like that, do you?”
“Don’t you think you’ve been on the computer enough for today?”
“If you don’t put those plants in a sunnier location, the leaves will turn all yellow.”

I’d have 'em running for an exorcist inside of a week.