Over 563 million rules?!? Fuck this is going to be a looooong thread if the OP steps up to my challenge.
Mods, where can we send donated hamsters?
Chiming in as another non-observant Jew who watches the boards on Saturday. If I can answer a question, I will.
Robin ;j
Well, perhaps Saturday morning is a naturally appropriate time for thinking thoughts about Judaism and God?
Bad, Robin! Bad bad girl!
Even if you are, in fact, spending your sabbaths riding around in cars, using computers, handling money, and turning your stove on and off, you should not be answering questions about Judaism on a Saturday. You want that your Tante Ruth should know what you do on Shabbat? Oy vey ist mir!
Uhmm, NoClueBoy, actually, that was my bra, and a certain Armenian gentleman would very much like to know how it got there.
[sigh!]How quickly they forget!
CJ
No Clue Boy, you got you some ‘splainin’ to do about how my little sister’s bra ended up in your back seat!!! :mad:
The Straight Dope has an international following, just remember that when someone seems to be posting on a Saturday it may actually be a Sunday or a Friday where they are.
Besides, if I’m asking about Judaism then I probably know very little about it, including what days are verbotten for questions.
I was just trying it on! 
Honest!
She had simply brought it to me. You won’t catch me mesing around with an Engineers interest, no siree
You want I should explain to the Older Men?
I will have you know that my Tante Ruth and I are usually IMing on Shabbos! So there! 
Robin
…or even a practising Jew, to be able to answer questions about Judaism.
Although IANATS I am a non-practising Jew who has absorbed a reasonable amount of information about Jewish history, culture and religion, through reading, contact with religious friends and extended family members, and eight years living in Israel (although educated in the secular side of the schooling system there).
I’m not the first to make that point. I did want to add that it is annoying when some non-Jews assume that just because you are Jewish you do/don’t do certain things.
This happens all the time, most recently when someone was telling my mother about her holiday, and describing the typical dish of the region she visited, which was pork-based. The person interrupted herself, saying, “Oh, but of course, you can’t eat pork!” This, to my Mum, is like a red rag to a bull. “I can eat whatever I like!” was her reply. She said it in a light-hearted tone so as not to offend her neighbour, who she knows meant well, but as my mother told me later, it pisses her off.
I’m nearbrew, plus I have shiskappeal, so I can check out a question regarding all kinds of groovy stuff relating to Judiasm if its posted during the Sabbath. That was probably the best thing about my stepbrother exploring his religion, I learned about it too! ;j And Yiddish, its about the niftiest language. One can mutter about it all day long and very few people in this area know what I’m saying … of course that tends to happen when I speak English too.
In all seriousness, what Martha said, plus I’m going to add a bit more.
Nothing irks me more than someone (usually an evangelical Christian) telling me that I must practice all tenets of my religion. Um, no. What I eat or do or believe is between me and my conscience. My religious education did not instill a love of rules; it instilled a sense of justice and fairness and doing the right thing for its own sake. I like to think my teachers and rabbis did a good job of it, too.
(FTR, I was raised Reform.)
Robin
:: just standing around whistling ::
Zev Steinhardt 
We’ve even had a couple of occasions when the fact that the answer was presented by a Gentile actually added the weight of perceived veracity to the statement, because the answer was not then seen as some sort of propaganda piece. (This did not apply to threads in which John John participated, of course.)
(It helps, of course, if the Gentile gets the answer right.)
Hmm… Does it mean you eat pork?
LOL!
I never did understand the epistemological connection between the Khazars and Mrs. Clinton’s glutei maximi, though!
If jamon serrano qualifies as ‘pork’ - guilty as charged.
Officially I’m a vegetarian, but my lapses are famously non-kosher.
Couldn’t Orthodox Jews have a Gentile print the threads out for them on Saturday or something?
Not a joke; I just don’t know shit about the more traditional forms of Judaism (all the Jews I’ve known have been Reform, except at least one who was Conservative).
10, now that y’all are back on Standard Time - but who’s counting?
Following a recent experience, it helps if the Jew gets it right, too! :smack:
And the interesting Jews are here every day of the week! ;j
(pork ‘n’ Mozzarella sandwich in hand… Jus’ kidding; I don’t really like pork all that much. Turkey tastes better and it’s better for you, too!)
Dani
Any chance you’re missing a pair panties as well? And yes, as you may have surmised, I found those in my car.