If you're Jewish and you know it clap your hands

In My Humble Opinion
1

eh…we Jews ain’t too creative. We see a good idea and we steal it. Might explain why there are so many of us in Hollywood.

So come on in, relax, have some potato latkas! You’re skin and bones. Take the plastic off the couches and put your feet up on the table.

Guys, don’t worry, JDT isn’t invited.

So…Mr. Magoo’s a Jew, are you?

2

I’m not Jewish, as far as I know. But I was once walking through the Diamond Districe in Manhattan and was accosted by a Lubovicher (spelling?). If you don’t know these guys, they look like very Orthodox folks – beard and all – but they’re aggressively proselytizing.

“Do you keep kosher?” he accused me.

“I’m not Jewish,” I replied.

“Yes, you ARE!” he insisted.

I don’t know. Maybe I just look the part.

3

Jews ain’t creative, eh? Where the hell did the Christians get their idea of a messiah from, then? :smiley:

Anyway, look back in MPSIMS for December for my Put on your yarmulka thread.

For now, let me put on my talis and sit in the back row of the synagogue…

4

Well, I know that I would enjoy a nice bowl of matzo ball soup followed up by a piece of gefilte fish, with that red horseradish sauce, of course.

5

Latkes are one of my favorite foods.
But i am not jewish… i am not a christian eirther, FWIW

6

I’m half Jewish. :smiley:

7

Goldie Hawn’s half too…

8

put them together what a fine looking scene.

9

::claps hands::

Father’s a rabbi. I absolutely hate it.

10

And I’m not fine enough on my own?

(Lordy, I’m in a flirty mood on these boards lately…)

11

I actually ate matzo ball soup for dinner tonight. Hah! Top that!

12

I felt guilty about not eating it.

13

I think we have a winner. Thanks TV time, that was funny.

14

I’m Jewish too…

I’m partial to kugel.

15

I’m clapping already, I’m clapping.

I would eat chicken soup with kenaidlach in public, but that would be (winces slightly, draws in breath, pulls back shoulders, shakes head and waves hands a bit, a la many of my older relatives) too Jewish, too Jewish.

My name IRL is Hebrew, even.

–Scribble.

16

Do me a small favor folks, and those of you who are Jewish, please post also in the “NON-christian” thread* I started. We (and this is with the approval of Czarcasm) are trying to conduct a poll. mazel tov :smiley:

  • or, if by some reason you are a Christian, but posting here, post in the other one, please. Thanks.
17

Touche!

18

:::Claps(twice):::

19

…clap clap…

Zev Steinhardt

20

I’ve traced my genealogy back to over 5000 ancestors, and so far, none of them are jewish. I’m so bummed! I’ve been a shabbas goy though.