I’ve learned to like it more over subsequent viewings, but…semi trucks can’t do wheelies. 
And got in himmel those were some fugly tuxes! Did people think they had to dress like that back then?
The Bond fan channels I watch on YouTube do universally pan the wardrobe department for the film. Dalton’s hairdresser also comes in for plenty of criticism, that slicked back look he sports in the casino scene, combined with the awful jacket… stuff of nightmares.
With a few minor changes, it could have been a cult classic:
- Timothy Dalton → Arnold Schwarzenegger
- Carey Lowell → Rae Dawn Chong
- David Hedison → Carl Weathers
- Wayne Newton → Richard Dawson
- M → General Kirby
- Isthmus → Val Verde
- Franz Sanchez → Franz Arius
- Licence to Kill → Commando 2
GoldenEye (1995)
Had another free night, so I jumped right into the Brosnan era.
GoldenEye feels like a throwback in many ways. I felt like this film could have – almost shot for shot – been dropped into the mid-to-late ‘70s Roger Moore era and fit right in. You’ve got the Russians as bad guys. You’ve got the silly scene in Q’s lab showing off his gadgets. You’ve got the beautiful, exotic villainess with a punny name. You’ve got Bond driving a tank through the streets of Moscow. And then there’s the secret underwater hideout-slash-giant satellite dish that was built how, exactly?
All classic Bond stuff, very familiar, and much of it had me grinning through a lot of this film.
And then, at the same time, it’s also an attempt to move the franchise forward. There’s more self-awareness of how 007 can come across. Judi Dench – a woman! – is M now, and she’s calling James out on his misogyny. Moneypenney, instead of hopelessly pining over James, is accusing him of sexual harassment. Alec’s speech at the end about all the vodka martinis drowning out the screams of everyone Bond had killed is supposed to hit some sort of emotional bullseye. They’re shooting for introspection, but it doesn’t really make any difference in what happens or how Bond acts.
I hadn’t realized there was a six-year gap between Licence to Kill and this one. Perhaps the whole Bond ethos was fading from the public consciousness, and the producers felt they couldn’t bring the character back without acknowledging this stuff for forward-thinking ‘90s audiences. Watching now, it just seems a little clunky.
I did enjoy most of the performances here. Sean Bean as the former 006 turned supervillain (for reasons) wasn’t the greatest Bond villain ever, but he was all right. Famke Janssen nailed it as Xenia Onatopp; when you’re playing a female supervillain who gets sexual pleasure from killing, and crushes people to death with her thighs, you gotta just throw yourself over the top with it – and Janssen did just that. I really liked Izabella Scorupco, whom I haven’t seen in anything else. Alan Cumming hit just the right note as the ethically-challenged ‘90s computer hacker guy. Robbie Coltrane and Joe Don Baker put in adequate supporting performances.
So I’d call this a pretty solid entry in the franchise. Except… Well, who haven’t I mentioned yet? Oh yeah, Pierce Brosnan.
So, yeah. Brosnan’s Bond just kind of fell a bit flat for me. He looks the part, sure. But Brosnan doesn’t have Connery’s swagger, or Moore’s charm, or Dalton’s fire. He was just kind of there, saying the lines and doing the things, without bringing anything unique to the role. I’ve got four more Brosnan entries to go, so I suppose we’ll see if he grows on me.
Next up: Tomorrow Never Dies
Goldeneye is one of my favourites. There are probably a few reasons behind that.
First up it was the first Bond I ever saw at the cinema and I still remember how much of a novelty that was at the time for me. I’d been so used to seeing the Bonds on the TV, usually recorded onto VHS off a broadcast, probably at Christmas (airing a Bond film at Xmas was, and probably still is, a big British tradition). I’d really wanted to see Licence to Kill in the same manner, but when it emerged as a ‘15’ certificate that dream was crushed instantly.
Secondly, well it’s just so much damn fun, isn’t it? I think it swaggers right up to the line between self-awareness and self-parody, hovers a foot over, then stays just on the right side. Contrast this to Diamonds are Forever (where the self-parody really kicked in), or several of the Moore films, and it comes away favourably.
I absolutely love the villains in this one. Somehow I managed to avoid the major spoiler about the main baddie, so was genuinely stunned when Alec stepped from the shadows with a breezy “Hello James”. Sean Bean was better known as a TV actor at the time but I think he nailed it. Alan Cumming is hilarious, with just the right dose of creepy little sh*t as Boris, and Famke Janssen is an absolute scream (quite literally as times) as Xenia.
Lastly, it has my favourite Q gag of the series.
I have no problem with Brosnan in this, although I do think he improved over his tenure, at least until Die Another Day anyway. Oh, and if you’re not such a fan, don’t worry - only 3 more of his to get through, not four! His last is… well, it’s something else, I’ll say that much, as I don’t want to spoil it!!
I like Goldeneye too - in addition to everything already mentioned, Natalya is an excellent (and somewhat atypical) ‘Bond girl’ - a proper character with her own agency, story, and feelings shown (or at least, much more so than most of the earlier examples). Another factor of its time, I guess - but a very good one.
Tomorrow Never Dies is one of my favourites in the series and by far Brosnan’s best in my view, both in terms of performance and quality of material. It seems to me Brosnan tried to combine the best bits of Connery and Moore, with some success - but ultimately, maybe should have made the character more ‘his own’, as Dalton and Craig did.
I like the scene with Q. He’s still a bit of a fusspot, but he doesn’t have the stick quite so far up his ass in this one. I wonder if the producers were thinking of making Bond’s relationship with M to be a bit more prickly, and for Q to be a bit more supportive and sympathetic.
And I do like the first scene with Joe Don Baker.
Just the right level of Bond casual-ness, without being too flippant.
ETA: And one of my favorite Bond girls; the one riding with him in the Aston Martin at the beginning. One scene, but nicely played.
Ah yes, I forgot about the silly car chase at the beginning (the idea of the 60s Aston being able to outpace a 90s Ferrari).
Dana Gould had a great bit about how Bond villains got their financing. “I sold a Carl Yastrzemski rookie card!” “My eccentric uncle left me this volcano base in his will!”
I hate Goldeneye. I’d put it like third worst. Mileage obviously varies!
I know, I know, they wanted to use Arecibo, but even in the 90s all you needed to communicate with a satellite was a three foot dish. That you can point, not wait for the satellite to fly right overhead.
Exactly. because no one cared about how a rocket lair volcano headquarters gets built*, or how a supertanker can retain its shape with no internal bracing. Or how an orbiting space station gets built with no one noticing.
But the thing that bugged me more was Joe Don Baker’s “elite” commandos, who weren’t even close to being in a position to help when Bond had already finished the job. I mean, they’re inching across ground in Ghillie suits while the shooting is being done miles away! Why? And then Bond, after a long random chase from the baddies, just manages to land right in the middle of them? Thanks guys, you’ve been so much help! All that, for a weak sight gag.
But I really did appreciate the “clicking pen” sequence. Bond was actually counting the clicks while bantering with the baddie! That’s how you survive as a double naught spy!
*yes yes Sean Connery. Point stands
Brosnan was a good Bond for the times. He brought the swagger and sophistication better than Dalton, but without dipping into parody territory, like Connery sometimes did and Moore did exclusively.
I think Brosnan improved in his later movies, but GoldenEye was overall the best of his era. The tank chase is one of the best chases ever, Natalya was a fantastic Bond girl, and the three villains of Alec, Xenia, and Boris were perfect.
Now I don’t mind other opinions, after all that’s what makes forums like this entertaining, but third worst?! Seriously, what’s all that about haha! I’m just kidding of course, it’s good to hear other people’s views. But I’d love to know which of The Man With The Golden Gun, A View to a Kill and Die Another Day you would put above this though! I’ve got it fourth top in my list.
This is probably why I personally rank The Spy Who Loved Me as my favorite. By the time that parachute opened five minutes in, that 13 year old immediately thought, “this is the greatest film I’ve ever seen.” I’ll also note that my favorites of the Connery run (Goldfinger and You Only Live Twice) are the two I have had the fortune to see in revival theaters on a big scren.
Apparently they did screenings of all of them recently in the UK, but it must’ve been very limited as I didn’t know about it until afterwards. I would have loved to have seen them all as originally intended.
Not to start a hijack!
But the worst mainstream Bond film by far is not Die Another Day but Skyfall. Then The World is Not Enough, Goldeneye, then come the usual suspects: VtaK, Moonraker. I actually like most of Die Another Day, I’d put it somewhere in the middle. People say, “what about the invisible car?” and I say “every Bond movie has its ‘invisible car’, we just chose to ignore most of them”.
I can find something enjoyable in almost every film, even Goldeneye, but Skyfall…is Woody Allen’s Casino Royale on somewhere?
All of that is rather pointless and improbable, but at least possible. The really stupid part is the two helicopters that also fly in when the Marines pop up all around Bond. The helicopters were hiding by being off the edge of the movie screen.
When I was in college, one of the dorms did a marathon showing of all the movies on videotape. That was mid-'80s, so not as many movies as today, but it was still in the neighborhood of 24 hours. I think I was the only one who tried to see the whole thing; fell asleep for about 30 minutes.
I thought Goldeneye was OK but not amazing the first time I saw it and I was kind of puzzled by people who were saying it was one of their favourites. It grew on me the second time I saw it, though (especially compared to a dud like The World Is Not Enough which I barely even remember except for Denise Richards and a godawful pun about Christmas). Alan Cumming definitely improves everything he touches!
ISWYDT
The drop-off in quality from Tomorrow Never Dies to The World Is Not Enough is perfectly illustrated in the latter’s Christmas came early pun compared to Moneypenny’s Cunning Linguist pun in the former.
Skyfall? The Bond film usually held to be in the top five Bond films?