I'm so sorry, your so stupid, or Canon product reps reply

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

My support question as submitted to Canon:

>> Original Message Follows:
>> -------------------------

>> INQUIRY: What is the difference in ink quantity between cartridges cl-41 color and cl-51 high yeild color. I’m looking for the ink volume or weight of each, or a percentage.
>> Thank you.
>

Their first reply:

>> Dear Mr. Jones:
>>
>> Thank you for contacting Canon product support. We value you as a
> Canon
>> customer and appreciate the opportunity to assist you with your
> iP6310D
>> printer.
>>
>> The information on the ink cartridges are as follows:
>>
>> CL-41 Color -
>>
>> Approx. 289* pages
>> Approx. 148** pages
>>
>> CL-52 Photo -
>>
>> Approx. 295* pages
>> Approx. 153** pages
>>
>> *Color document: Declared yield value in accordance with ISO/IEC
>> FCD24711. Values obtained by continuous printing.
>>
>> **Photo (4" x 6"): When printing Canon standard patterns on 4" x 6"
>> <paper type> continuously with the default settings of <paper type>
>> using Windows XP printer driver in borderless printing mode and
> Windows
>> XP Photo Printing Wizard.
>>
>> Please let us know if we can be of any further assistance with your
>> iP6310D printer.
>>
>> Thank you for choosing Canon.
>>
>> Sincerely,
>>
>> Althea
>> Technical Support Representative

My response:

 Original Message Follows:
> -------------------------
>
> Please note I asked for the two sizes of the color cartridge cl-41 and
> cl-51. I want to know how much more ink is in the high yield
cartridge.
> I didn’t ask for cl-41 color and cl-52 photo, which are different
inks.
Their second reply by a different person:

 Dear Bob:
>
> Thank you for your reply.
>
> The CL-41 ink tanks contains 4ml of each color in the tank.
>
> The CL-52 ink tank contains, 7ml of each color in the tank.
>
> We hope this information is helpful to you. Please feel free to
contact
> us again if you have any other questions or concerns regarding the
> iP6310D printer.
>
> Thank you for choosing Canon.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> Frida
> Technical Support Representative
My response:

Original Message Follows:

Please read the cartridge numbers carefuly. Support continues to answer
my question for the wrong ink cartridges.

The question is about:

CL-41 that’s CL-fortyone

CL-51 that’s CL-fiftyone

Do not involve the photo cartridge in any way.

Next an on-line satisfaction survey linked to my submitted question:

I received a link to a satisfaction survey that I fill out because it’s linked to this case. I failed them on all questions dealing with the intellelgence and worth of their information sent. I then filled in the section for free style typing of my opinion asking what would improve their customer service. I haven’t been nasty yet! I told them to review reading comprehension with their employees. All the failed service questions are marked so, because I still have not had the original question answered.

Their reply number three:

Dear John:

Thank you for your reply.

Neither the CL-41 or the CL-51 have photo inks. The CL-52 has Photo
inks in it.

We hope this information is helpful to you. Please feel free to contact
us again if you have any other questions or concerns.

Thank you for choosing Canon.

Sincerely,

Frida
Technical Support Representative
Various errata:
Every reply has the warning that questions are hard to answer by e-mail and to feel free to call for support with a $9.99 fee.
I haven’t sent back a reply yet. I’m thinking a copy of the e-mail is going via mail to somebody higher up, and I’ll see if they can read and comprehend a question. I’ll keep sending in the question to see if I can get a correct reply before the year 2525. The year 2525 is in reference to old cold war song about armageddon.

I’m to the point where is is starting to piss me off.

2

This looks like fun. Where is the link or email to submit a question? I want to ask them this and see if they get it right.

3

Aha! It’s a new phishing scam! If they mis-answer your question enough times, you’ll get steamed up enough that it’s worth the $9.99 just to call them up and scream at them in person. Then they’ll still refuse to answer your question because you are being verbally abusive. Then they get to ding you for another 10 clams when you call back to complain that they charged you without answering your original question. If you do manage to get them to agree to refund your dough, you’ll later find they only refunded the first 10 bucks. So you have to call them again for another $10 …

Genius, pure evil genius.

4

Maybe we should all start sending the same query and see how many different answers we get. My personal favorite so far is:

5

Their second reply could just be a case of a typo. I’m pretty sure the CL41 contains 12 ml of ink (3 x 4ml) and the CL51 holds 21 ml (3 x 7 ml).

This is no reason to go easy on them. If this company was in the motor and oil business they would sell you a car for $100 and charge you $200 a gallon for gasoline.

As the possessor of a Pixma MP150, my dislike of Canon is very sincere.

6

Cool. It’s the high tech version of “A cheeseburger, french fries, and a large – orange – drink!”

7

Ha. That’s hilarious.

Can I mention a head-scratching incident of remarkable slow-wittedness that I observed today? Thanks!

I purchased two horrible wee cigarillos today at a filling station. The total was $3.58, and to minimize change-wear on my pockets, I gave the clerk four dollars and eight cents.

She said, “One dollar is your change,” and gave me a shiny loon. I figure she’s just not paying close attention and, trying to be helpful, I offer “You’ve given me too much change,” and slide the loonie back to her.

All of the sudden she gets this uncertain, vaguely suspicious look on her face, and a few seconds tick by as she stands stock still, processing. I can see she’s confused and feel a bit embarrassed for her. I try to keep a helpful tone in my voice and say, “You should give me fifty cents.”

She looks at her partner for confirmation, and he nods. She takes two quarters out of the till and slides them across to me, together with the loonie she’d given me originally. Now I see where the confusion is coming from, and say, “No, no… just fifty cents.”

She reaches into the till and gets another fifty cents, and slides it together with the rest of the change. “Is that okay?”

I can’t explain why, but I feel horribly embarrassed now. I can tell I’m grinning like an idiot, trying to work out how to be polite in this situation. (By which I mean avoiding making her feel like an idiot.)

I take two quarters off the counter and say, “That’s fine… thanks…” and bolt for the door. As I’m on the way out, I hear the younger guy explaining to her, “He was telling you that you gave him too much change.”

:smack:

The thing is, I chatted with her before the transaction and she didn’t seem mentally retarded or anything. Just utterly unable to work out what change to give back from $4.08 on $3.58.

8

That’s what did it. She was so taken aback by how debonair and witty and charming you were, that she went all a’flutter in the brain.

:cool:

9

Onion rings.

10

You should have asked her how much ink is in the CL-51.

11

I considered this morning asking with a new submital how many ounces of ink are in the CL-51 cartridge. It may have the same amount of ink as CL-52, but I won’t assume it does, because nothing requires it to. I fear a question like that on a reply will confuse them to the point of having a brain seizure. I learned that Canon is a confused group of people a long time ago, when I bought a camcordor from them. I do not buy from them if it can be helped. Their site is hard to find what you want, and this is what I expected from them before I even asked the question. The cartridges are for my mother’s printer she got when buying a camera.

12

This theory, which is mine, is as follows:

  • If a certain product poses enough problems, corporate policy becomes “Give absolutely NO information about this product.”
    Rationale: Anything is better than letting bad news get out about a product, especially if you deal with internet-using geekerati. Let 'em complain about tech support idiots; there’s no pleasing 'em, so nobody much listens, and using idiots costs less anyway and encourage people to pay for phone support. Finally, losing customers is fine because we can always lower prices and lassoo a few more suckers.
13

Well, you now know that “The CL-41 ink tanks contains 4ml of each color in the tank.” If you ask about just the CL-51, I have a hard time seeing how they can screw that up. (Though please post again if they do :D)

14

Corollary to my theory above:*
If enough customers ask about something, IT IS PROPRIETARY INFORMATION. So just give 'em the “duhhh” treatment.

Can a theory have a corollary, or does it first have to be adopted as a rule? And do I look like I give a shit?

15

There are still at least a few unexplored wrong answers they could give you, for example:

“There is no difference, we use the same kind of ink in both”

and

“The difference is 4ml”

16

I could tell you how precisely much ink is in the CL-51, but then:

  • I’d have to kill you
  • my head would explode
  • I’d get fired
  • the company would promptly stop making CL-51
17

Whoops! You’re right. Haven’t heard that piece since the 80s. :smiley:

18

Directly from the box,

Canon Cl 51 cartridge contains 21 mils of ink. (3 X 7mil of each colour).

Canon Cl 41 cartridge contains 12 mils of ink. (3 X 4 mil of each colour).

Hope this helps! :smiley:

19

We don’t need no steenkin’ box!!1

20

checks thread title
notes accusation of stupidity
re-checks spelling in thread title
Gaudere strikes again!
:wink: