Incredibly lazy driver

A few months ago, I was in the parking lot of a Sam’s Club when I encountered the laziest driver that I have ever seen.

As I’m driving down one of the lanes, looking for a parking spot, the motorist in front of me stops. There were no empty parking spaces nearby, so after about thirty seconds, I craned my neck to see what was going on.

I discovered that one of the parked cars was stalled, and was getting a jump start. You could tell that they had just started, since the drivers of both cars were standing outside their vehicles.

Apparently, the fella in front of me decided to wait for this other guy to get his jump start, so that he could claim the soon-to-be-vacated parking spot – a cushy spot right close to the Sam’s Club entrance. Never mind that there were plenty of empty spots around – this one was right by the entrance, by Jiminy! In the meantime, traffic was building up behind us, so I was unable to back out of the way.

After a five minute wait (which felt more like an hour), the parked car finally pulled out of its slot. The fella in front of me quickly pulled right in, to my tremendous relief. I drove right past him and quickly claimed a slot in the adjacent lane.

Boy, I sure hope that wait was worth it for this fella.

I always see lazy shits like this. Why can’t they just park three to six spaces down; the time they waste waiting for a close parking spot surely isn’t worth it.

It’s not like they have to walk a mile from where they parked. I can’t understand it. I just park wherever there is parking; the further it is, the more exercise I get, IMHO.

I just took my morning mile-and-a-half walk. And I wasn’t even shopping. I don’t understand people who wait and wait for a “good” parking space*. I’ve often parked much farther away and then walked past them as they were still waiting.
*[sub]Of course there are some people who can’t walk far for physical reasons. I was referring to people who were just lazy.[/sub]

And people still question that I can spot Americans from 200 meters away based solely on their girth.

The thing is, I can understand waiting for a parked car to pull out. Such a wait is hardly unreasonable.

But to wait for this fella to get a jump start??? Lazy, lazy, lazy!

My unique and perhaps unpopular take on lazy -

I don’t mean to be blasphemous, but there’s something wrong about fast food drive throughs. Unless you live in Sporkhead, Montana and are in the middle of the worst blizzard in 100 years, get your butt out of the car and walk to the inside counter. Then you can order your 3000 calorie/100 Gm of fat meal. Or maybe the problem is being caught in the act?

American do EVERYTHING in cars, surely you can’t deny them sustenance.

I suggest that cars be modified to provide a workout to the drivers:

  1. Brakes don’t work with under 150 lbs, pressure.
  2. In cars with automatic transmission and cruise control, put in “stair stepper” mode for clutch and brake pedals.
  3. For upper body strength, power steering should fight AGAINST driver input.

Once I was at the post office after its regular business hours. They leave the lobby open so you can use the stamp machines, weigh letters, check your post office box, etc. There were no other cars at all in the lot when I arrived, so I parked in the spot closest to the door. All the other parking spots were as much as five whole feet away from my spot. When I finished buying stamps I came out of the lobby and found a guy in a car waiting for me to vacate my spot so he could take it! There were twelve other empty spots! He might have had to walk five more feet! It was amazing. I wasn’t in a handicapped spot, either, for those of you who are wondering.