Indicators that you can probably delete someone from your friend list on Facebook?

Facebook does strange things with my notifications, and randomly drops some people’s updates from my feed as though they don’t exist. With one thing and another, it often takes me a while to realise I haven’t been seeing anything from them in a while. So, I don’t take offence when people don’t comment on or like my stuff because I figure the same thing is maybe happening to them… or maybe they just have a life and don’t live to acknowledge every contribution I make to a social networking site.

I tend to unfriend people I only added because I felt like I had some sort of social obligation to accept their request in the first place, and I generally only do that if they make a lot of updates that annoy me.

I’ve only ever deleted two or three people from my list. One was a girl who I used to be friends with and we basically stopped enjoying each others company and drifted apart. The two others either posted racist stuff or were really annoying with their hourly status updates.

Like enalzi said, I would only take them off my friend list if I really wanted to not deal with them ever again. Even people who post political crap, I just keep them as “friends” and click Hide.

I think you’re experiencing postnatal hormones and are overreacting just a tinch. If only 20% percent of your friends did not acknowledge your recent event announcement (congratulations, btw) on freaking fb, I’d say you were doing pretty well in the friend department.

As to the OP, I do not accept every friend invitation so I’m pretty happy with my friend list. The only person I’ve ever deleted assaulted my adult daughter. His actions were a complete surprise to both of us, but, of course, being friends of any kind after that was completely out of the question.

Massive overreaction, but not surprising given what I say below.

I read my facebook page about twice a week. I post something about once a month. I post something on other people’s pages…well, like twice so far. Ever. It is just not that important to me and I don’t feel the need to comment on every little thing or even on most important things on peope’s pages.

If you were my IRL friend and had a kid, you’d hear from me either in person or over the phone, not on your facebook page. Depending on how close we are and such, it might take a month or more. Especially since I have some issues when it comes to the parents of small children (Who in my experience become some of the most selfish and self-centered people on Earth).

Sounds like somebody’s sour that they and their new baby aren’t the center of everyone’s universe.

I think you are majorly overreacting. My newsfeed seems to be a constant stream of baby pictures, announcements, ect. If I sat there looking through every picture and commenting on everything, I’d never leave my computer. If I don’t log on to facebook for a couple of days, I’m likely to miss a lot of those announcements as well.

New mothers tend to suffer from a “my baby is the center of the universe” syndrome. I’m sure I won’t be the first one to break this to you, but your baby is going to be the center of your universe, not anyone else’s. To defriend someone for not giving you sufficient acknowledgement, despite the fact that you yourself haven’t even made the effort to notify them personally is horribly self absorbed and childish.

You had a baby. Congratulations. Time to get over yourself now.

I won’t keep FB friends who use it for shit-stirring and personal drama. I once accepted a friend request from a co-worker, then saw that many of her status updates were thinly-veiled references to “some people” and “backstabbers.” I instantly de-friended her.

My litmus test for FB is if I actually know who a person is. I’m not the only person who occasionally looks at their feed and wonders who the hell all these people are, am I? I went through and deleted a bunch of people whose names I couldn’t identify awhile ago.

Being Facebook friends with someone is such a low level of commitment, that’s about all I really ask. That I actually know who you are.

This is an overreaction. Some people don’t check Facebook very often. Facebook is set up now so that it’s easy to miss updates because they’re arranged strangely.

Also, many times people will see things and enjoy them but not comment on them because 300 people have already done so or they can’t think of anything to say that’s not trite and cheesy so they think they might as well not bother and will say something to you if they see you in person. This is me. I’ve never been good at fakey bubbly comments about things and my friends know it. I did post an “ooooooooh!” over one friend’s baby picture, but I had also been to her baby shower and later met and held said baby. Right now a lot of people on my friends list are getting married, but they’re people I haven’t seen in at least 5+ years so it feels odd to suddenly pop up and comment on wedding photos.

If you de-friend someone, do they get a notification to that effect?


No, but there are Greasemonkey scripts you can install for Firefox that will notify you when somebody unfriends you. I use it, heh.

Good. The only people I’ve deleted are too dumb to breathe, much less install a Greasemonkey script.

(For example, the high school acquaintance who likes to post screeds against swine flu vaccine and fluoridated water, and when I offer peer-reviewed studies that contradict her “but Hitler used chemicals similar to fluoride!!”, I get called a shill of the fluoridation industry. Her? Deleted.)

This. I have a friend who had a baby recently, and I actually had to look for the FB announcement to comment, since it didn’t show up on my feed for whatever reason. Facebook doesn’t automatically detect how important a status update is, so things often get missed.

I haven’t deleted any friends, but I did “hide” one person because all his posts pertained to his multi-level marketing business and it was getting rather old.

So the other 80% did. If only one or two people commented, in your place, i would be miffed for sure. That is not the case here.

Sometimes I don’t go on FB for two weeks. No, not a litmus test. Anyway, if someone close to me had a baby I wouldn’t expect to hear about first on FB.

I don’t want to be friends with anybody who has a facebook account.

I’ve only deleted 3 people from my list. 2 I didn’t actually know (they added me because they know my SO) and the other was a co-worker that was constantly posting things. I mean, she’d post 5-10 music videos every day, but rarely anything else.

I don’t care about a complete stranger’s updates and if I want to watch a bunch of videos I’ll just go to youtube. I also don’t expect people to comment on all of my updates or photos. I rarely comment on theirs so I really can’t hold it against them. If whatever it is is actually a big deal, chances are we’ll talk about it on the phone or in person. For instance, a friend was recently sexually assaulted and made a vague update about it on FB (she didn’t spell out what happened, but I knew what was up from another source). I didn’t say anything on FB because 1- What could I possibly say that wouldn’t be useless online? and 2- I know I’ll see her in person tomorrow and we can talk then if she wants to.

Not commenting online doesn’t mean someone doesn’t care.

I use FB for 2 things: keep in touch with family back in the States and play games - specifically Castle Age and Mafia Wars. To do well with the games, I need lots of friends that I’ve never met. The 2 groups get cluttered on my news feed. While I have sorted them into groups (games, family, Michigan friends, etc.), I still often miss useful news items.

The truth is, FB is NOT a good way to send important information electronically. Email is still the best way to make sure that I see something. Twitter, FB, my RSS feeder can all overwhelm me and I do miss important things. That is never the case with email.

However, I almost NEVER “like” or “comment” posts on FB. I know it’s only a single click to “like”, but I’d rather use that click to go on to the next thing.

The REAL test is if they don’t comment on your baby IRL. Then they clearly don’t care for you and should be deleted.