Last night a friend mentioned to me that he hadn’t watered at all last month but his water bill remained the same. My first response was to try and figure out how the extra water might have been used, his first response was to accuse the water company of cheating. I pointed out that a new girlfriend had moved in with him, who showers, flushes the toilet washes her hands and does laundry. So aside from watering she would account for about 1/3 of water usage. His response was she uses almost no water. I asked if the meter readings were on his bill, his response was that they set it up so that a laymen can’t read the meters. A complete denial of facts that don’t suit his narrative. I have to assume that he and others like him apply this same principle to most everything in their lives. Kind of a scary thought
Always need to check if it was an actual or estimate bill. Often the estimated bill can be wildly off.
- Observe something.
- Draw conclusions.
- Refuse to be influenced by facts or potential facts.
- Rinse and repeat. As it were.
Good point!
Yes, and at least in this case, his narrative is that “they’re cheating me.” Is this a pattern with him? Is he quick to accuse other individuals and/or institutions of cheating him?
I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that this is so—and, if so, that at least one of the following is true:
- He’s had genuine experience in the past with people trying to con, cheat, or screw him over, and this has made him suspicious and distrustful.
- He himself is dishonest and would cheat given the opportunity. (People often suspect others of doing what they would do themselves.)
- He grew up with parents who were suspicious and distrustful, and they taught him to be that way too.
He has a narcissistic personality disorder, so you are right on track.
Maybe he did the “charge me the same amount every month” budget thing with the water company.
Another good discussion we had. He told me he was benching 400# on his bow flex. So I asked him if the weight on a bow flex was progressive and reminded him that he was short and not fully extending the bows for maximum weight. I asked if he checked the accuracy and how much weight they gained per inch. He informed me that they were certified by weights and measures and yes he was fully extending the 100%. Total refusal to even consider any possibility that he wasn’t benching 400#. He is 80 yeras old, and 165#. Good shape but not at all " Built". The most I could accept was 200# and I would even doubt that.
In regard to the water bill, he might have a leak that is his responsibility to repair that he won’t find if he thinks the water company is cheating him.
As for the weights, seems I’ve met a lot of people in my life who have lifted far greater weight than they looked capable of doing. But you can’t judge someone’s strength on looks, you have to see them lift the weight. And guess what, for one reason or another none of them could.