Last night my husband was telling me about a road trip to the States him and his friends took several years ago. They had problems at the border and it took a while before they were allowed to enter the States. The situation sounded like the beginning of a joke, and I figure you guys can come up with a good one…
…so…
An Ontarian, a Québecois, a Nova Scotian and an Israeli cross the border into the US…
4 people isn’t funny. 3 is. Why didn’t he go with just 2 friends?
He’s not one for telling good jokes! Fine then, forget about the Nova Scotian. Don’t worry about making him feel bad; they’re used to it. 
OK, I’ll try:
An Ontarian, a Québecois, a Nova Scotian and an Israeli cross the border into the US. The Ontarian is driving and the border guard comes up to him and says: “License and registration please.” The driver answers: “My License? I thought you boys had that since two years ago.” The Nova Scotian in the passenger seat says: “Don’t listen to him, officer, he’s drunk off his face!” The Israeli pipes in from the back seat: “I told you we wouldn’t get far in that stolen car…” and the Québecois yells from the trunk: “Are we across the border yet?”
… and the Border Patrol agent said, “What is this, some kind of joke?”
The Aristocrats!
…Border patrol interviews each of them in turn. He says to the Israeli ‘Occupation?’, and the Israeli says ‘No, just a holiday’
The Ontarian, a Québecois, a Nova Scotian and an Israeli are denied access across the border. They see an American blonde woman through the layers of fence standing on the US side. They yell to her “How do you get get to the other side?!”
She looks confused, thinks for a moment, then yells back “You are on the other side!”
An Ontarian, a Québecois, a Nova Scotian and an Israeli cross the border into the US. at Niagara Falls. The customs agent asked, “Anything to declare?”
The Ontarian declared “O Canada, my home and native land!” and jumped into the waterfall.
Le Québecois declared “Je me souviens!” and dove in after him.
The Nova Scotian declared “'God damn them all, I was told we’d plunder the seas for American gold!” and dove right in.
And the israeli handed over his declaration form, walked across the bridge and said “What, we should ALL suffer?”