Is it a collation or a Festive Board? Collation is just the normal refreshment before or after a lodge meeting. A Festive Board is a special occasion and is more formal.
Socially, expect people to be interested in you and why you are there. Masons are very very friendly. And yeah, they love to eat.
I think Zsofia offered all the advice you need really. No one will expect you to know what’s going on. Business casual is acceptable, but a suit is the norm for Brothers of the lodge.
And yes, go with the full ritual. You cheat yourself if you don’t. There is no reason to rush Masonry. If you’re really into it, then you’re making a lifetime commitment. If you’re not really into it then don’t waste anyone’s time. The rituals are a lot of work to put together and it’s always disappointing to perform the rituals for someone who really doesn’t give a shit and just disappears. And yes memorization is involved in New York too.
But he’s asking about a meet and greet dinner, not about what to expect if he becomes a Mason.
Any other accounts of the dress code? For this first meeting, must I wear a black suit with a white shirt and black tie? Or would that be too formal for someone who was merely a guest and not actually a member? Any info about what you wore to the first dinner, and where you were, would be helpful.
I was told what to wear; I dressed appropriately for initiation into each degree. Asking members for advice is the best way to go; you will not be told any of the BS these happy pranksters are handing you in this thread.
You can always ask the person that invited you to come to dinner, Just ask what is the dress code.
You have nothing to worry about. It is a way of you getting to know the members.Just go and enjoy the dinner and the fellowship. If you like what you see ask for an application.
Can I ask a couple more questions here? I have a fairly close acquaintance who is a Mason, and I’ve observed some things that made me scratch my head.
The little handbook that’s written in secret code or whatever: I’ve seen it, and my friend/acquaintance is all “I can’t tell”. If we have Masons here, and someone starts an “Ask the Mason” thread, is this archaic “secret” stuff still all for serious? Would anyone tell me the [apparently it must be fairly simple] code-break for the book or is it drilled into you not to under penalty of death/hell?
My acquaintance, who lives in a fairly rural area, joined under the sponsorship of a couple longtime Mason friends, and within like a year or so, was inducted as a 32nd degree Mason – this is the highest attainable, isn’t it? and traditionally only conferred after years of working onesself up the ranks?. However, I get the impression that the Grand Lodge (or whatever it’s called) is hard up for members and it’s easier in this day and age to be catapulted up the ranks (my acquaintance is early 40’s, upstanding, God-fearing guy). So is it easier than ever to get to be 32nd degree?
Well, it wouldn’t be secret if we told, would it? Honestly, the secrets aren’t that important, that they are secret is.
No, the highest degree possible is the third degree, Master Mason. The 32nd degree is awarded by the Scottish Rite, which is one of the many appendent bodies of Masonry (the Shrine being the most famous of these). Like the degree of Master Mason in Blue Lodge Masonry, the 32nd degree is the fully initiated degree of the Scottish Rite, though unlike Master Mason, there is a further degree in the Scottish Rite, but there is no initiation associated with the 33rd degree, it’s a recognition to those who have given much of themselves to the Rite.
It’s my understanding that this is one of the most basic tenets of Masonry everywhere. That Masons do not actively recruit for new members. The most some lodges will allow is that someone suggest to you that you might be interested in asking to join.
Gotcha, thanks for the info. And I understand about the “secrets”; having some proprietary (for lack of a better word) information is fairly common/important in all sorts of affiliations, one way or another. It’s a defining characteristic, so to speak. So I understand – I’m just curious as hell.
Oh, don’t even. The Eastern Star is the ladies’ auxiliary. You have to have a man in your family be a Mason to join. (And they can join too, so it isn’t even like you get to have a clubhouse.) It’s really the “believe in a deity” thing that keeps me out, though. That and the fact that I don’t need another thing I’d have to bring a covered dish to.
Rule #6 of Fight Club is that if you call it a “Masons Meeting” everybody understands why you don’t talk about it. (Explaining the blood is up to you, though).
Just got back from the dinner. It went very, very well. I had a great time. The lodge here is a really beautiful building and when I first got there, a guy (one of the younger members, seemed to be in his mid-30s) gave me a talk about the Masons and how to join, gave me the paperwork to fill out and everything. He showed me the library with wood paneled walls covered with framed photographs of every past master of the lodge; it was just incredible to see. The dinner was great, I talked to a lot of very interesting guys and I think they were really enthusiastic that I was there. They ranged in age from mid 30s to 60 and older, most were probably in their 60s or mid 50s. About thirty guys total at the dinner, and I met most of them personally. (A lot of guys named Bill and Bob. We joked about keeping the names straight - I was glad to know I wasn’t alone in getting people mixed up.) They said they would vote early next month about letting me in; from the way they talked, it seemed like they had already decided they were definitely going to do it.
I wore a black suit, white shirt, and black tie; I was the most dressed-up person there. Mostly they wore business casual, cardigans, and a few guys even had Carhartt jackets and other such stuff (they probably just came from work.) There was a really old guy who looked and sounded exactly like Bruce Dern.
Overall a very good experience and I am excited about being part of this.
Co-Masonry has womens and mixed lodges. For more esoteric stuff there is Memphis Misraim which has women’s lodges. These are not recognized by mainstream Masonry.
Masons are very gregarious about the remembering names thing. As a Mason if you go out and about within the Grand Lodge you meet so many people that it’s hard to keep track of everyone’s name, and which lodge they belong to. So no one takes it too seriously.
As to whether they’ll let you in or not, proper protocol is to investigate you, send some guys over to ask you some questions, but for the most part it’s a pretty easy thing. If you show that you are interested and that you really want to do it people can intuit your intentions to some degree. You’ll pass the sniff test. People who aren’t that serious wash out early. Most Masons I’ve met are really nice guys. You get the occasional dickhead, but whatever.
