When I come in from a long walk and I have to make supper and do stuff, that’s when my cat decides that she must play RIGHT F’N NOW! She can sleep for 23 1/2 hours out of 24, but when I’m busy, that’s play time.
Paper shredding. My pup is now one year old and will still track down any bit of paper/card/toilet roll left in biting reach in the house and shred it to pieces. I can hear him in another room tearing up a paperback right now, but don’t have the energy to go get it off him.
My facebook cover photo is a picture of him shredding his puppy training manual. Like this
One of our dogs keeps trying to bring a poopsicle (frozen horseshit) into the house. She knows she isn’t allowed to do this, so she is very sneaky/discrete about it. She does this every winter.
My dog goes apeshit when it’s time to walk. Barking, jumping, dancing, whipping her leash around. It doesn’t stop until we cross from the end of the driveway to the road.
Many times I’ve gotten jumped on (she’s 90lb) and whipped by the leash. Hate it, never figured out how to correct it. She’s almost 12 now so there’s no stopping it (and sadly I feel it’s like 90% of her exercise for the day, aside from our slow walk) so I let it happen.
But she’s the best damn dog ever. Calm as can be, too…
Bed hogging. Kaia likes to be soooo close to me that she gradually pushes me closer and closer to the edge of the bed throughout the night. There have been a few occasions where I’ve abruptly been woken up as one or both of my legs fell off the side of the bed.
She’s saved because it took us almost a year before she’d let us pet her for more than a few seconds without running away. Every time we think of complaining because she moves her head between your face and whatever you’re reading we remember the months of her bonding with Mojo but being terrified of us. Then we remember how hard we worked so she felt comfortable being affectionate and realize this is all our own fault
Barging through the bathroom door when I’m on the toilet. The door doesn’t latch properly unless you wiggle it just right, and often that doesn’t happen if I’m in a hurry. Within 15 seconds, the girlcat is bashing her little head on it and it pops open, and she saunters in with her brother following, all, “'sup?”
I swear to god, I finally got my children growed up enough to not barge in on mom’s toilet time, and now it’s the fecking cats. Life is not fair.
None of my little darlings allow me ‘me time’ in the bathroom. Any and all activities taking place in said room are closely monitored by Misses Widget and Maggie. Mister Turk often observes from his vantage point on the vanity counter.
Working in the kitchen is also closely supervised - at ground level. I’ve learned to slide my feet rather than pick them up because if I don’t, I run the risk of stepping on Miss Widget, who is afraid she’ll miss something if she isn’t winding herself around my ankles at all times.
Miss Maggie is quite fond of blocking my view of the computer monitor whenever possible. Then she has the nerve to look affronted while I deposit her on the floor just so she can leap back up and sit in front of the monitor again.
Finally there is Mister Turk, who picks the worst times for his cuddles - often when I’m trying to get ready to go to work and I’m already late. When 18 pounds of cuddle wants cuddle time - all he has to do is get in my lap and hunker down.
My “baby” has grown older and his joints are bad. Unfortunately he is no longer able to jump off the bed at night as he will injure himself and knows this. Instead, to awaken me, he climbs on my head. As with most older mammals, he has to pee frequently at night so I am constantly letting him off the bed and putting him back on the bed. At least three or four times a night. As irritating as this is, I do thank goodness for the doggy door. Before you ask, no he will not tolerate staying on the floor but will paw and bark until I pick him back up. The cutest part is his “brother” who is a year younger, lifts his head with an expression like “again???” each time I am awakened to put him down to go out.
My adorable kitty only demands 100% of my attention 95% of the time. She is the most vocal cat I’ve ever seen. She will chain-meow loudly if I’m not petting, holding, or talking to her.
Mosby is an out-of-the-box thinker. He poops on the floor. It’s always right next to the box and it’s never pee, so I just live with it.
I’m sure it’s a territorial thing, as I have often seen him poop on the floor just moments after I’ve cleaned the box and filled it with fresh litter.
But you know what? The box is in the bathroom. It’s way easier to pick up a couple of cat turds and chuck them in the toilet than it is to deal with multiple cat boxes.
I cannot use the bathroom without feline assistance. I have been known to let out a yelp while showering as Mayme likes to paw at me through the curtain, usually when I’m not paying attention. Scares the bejeebers out of me. Or I will have my head back, eyes closed, relaxed, rinsing shampoo out of my hair, and MEOW!!
Dot is not a cuddler. However, her “mom time” is always when I’m attempting to work. Okay, come up here and curl up. Nope, mom, you must hold my butt. Seriously. When she curls up on me, I must hold her hind end, tail curled under. Puts the kibosh on typing. If I try to move her, she low growls and glares. I feel bad that she doesn’t get as much attention as the other two terrors, so I will put up with it and call it break time.
All three MUST sleep between my ankles at night. If not between my ankles, then on them. Not very comfortable. If I move, Mayme will come up the bed, get in my face really close, and huffy puff at me. Lucy will walk up me, wait until I’m settled, and walk back down to take “her place”.
My big ol’ Maine Coon (Al) has started herding me like he’s a damn cattle dog, to try and get me to go to his food bowl when it’s his mealtime. The chief problem is that as far as he’s concerned it is ALWAYS mealtime, even if I just fed him five minutes ago. (“Al, dude, I just fed you! I know I did because I was there, remember?”) No nipping, thank goodness, but a persistent stubbornness about being completely and totally in my way. Then I get glared at when I (accidentally! I swear I didn’t see him!) kick his haunch or something and then I have to feel all bad because he’s getting seriously elderly and has that “old cat” boniness now.
One of his most frequently-heard nicknames is Mister InTheWay.
My other cat is also a bathroom invader. What is UP with the big white litter box that makes them feel the need to supervise and bonk their head against your shin?
Maguire (13yo Yellow Lab mix) can’t go more than 4 hours without going outside, or doing business. Lots of wee-wee pads, and getting up at 3 am. Getting old sucks!
Maggie (5yo rescued Chiweenie). She, as others have said, thinks that anyone on the toilet needs to be petting her whilst they sit upon the throne. She comes running at top speed whenever someone heads to the bathrrom, and will claw at the door until you let her in if you open the toilet lid. Turn on the bath, and she runs and hides! She is also insanely jealous of Rocco, and will insist on sitting on your lap whenever he does; accordingly, poor Rocco ends up on your chest, pushed out of the lap (which is quite endearing, I might add).
Rocco (2 yo rescued Chihuahua)… well, see, he ends up right on your chest, all evening long. That’s no problem… but…
He farts.
A lot.
SBDs.
Very S, VERY D. Sound asleep, snoring loudly, and passing gas that will curl your hair, inches below your face, on your chest, because Maggie (the bitch!) won’t let him ever sit on Daddy’s lap.
To top it off, he never farts when they are sitting on my wife. Just me. Must be love.
I printed this lolcat out and hung it on my fridge.
My cat likes to march around on us while we’re sleeping; if she slips while marching over my face, however, she has no concept of, “Don’t use the claws to stop your slide!” :eek:
