Is it actually required to dress like a cartoon character to practice before English courts?

[Northern_Piper]

Previous thread where the issue came up: What’s a Canadian courtroom like?

@Beware_of_Doug

@Northern Piper

a long-sleeved black waistcoat

I’d always thought a waistcoat (weskit) was a vest. How can something with sleeves be a vest? Please cite appropriate statutes and like that.

@Northern_Piper

My Lord,

We would submit that linguistic authorities recognize two different, albeit related, definitions for the noun, “waistcoat.” If Your Lordship would care to refer to Tab 5 of our Book of Authorities - no, My Lord, I believe Your Lordship has picked up my learned friend’s Book of Authorites - ours is the blue Book of Authorities, not the turquoise Book of Authorities - yes, My Lord, that is it - yes, it is rather weighty - sadly, some of your fellow judges have been rather prolix - Tab 5, My Lord - yes, you have it.

You will note there, My Lord, that the American Heritage College Dictionary gives two definitions for the word “waistcoat” - yes, My Lord it is sometimes pronounced “weskit”, usually by Niles Crane wannabes - no, My Lord, I was not aware you prefer to use that pronunciation - as Your Lordship pleases.

In any event, we quote two definitions:

1. A garment formerly worn by men under a doublet. 2. Chiefly British A short, sleeveless, collarless garment worn especially over a shirt and often under a suit jacket; a vest.

Now, while the second definition is the more common meaning, we are dealing here with a matter of considerable antiquity. Your Lordship is doubtless aware that our garb is descended from medieval attire, when gowns or doublets were worn over other layers of clothing. The climate of England was of course permanently inclement, and central heating non-existant. Our long-sleeved under-garment is descended from the long-sleeved waistcoats worn under doublets and other gowns, and is appropriately denominated a “waistcoat.”

One interesting example of the antiquity of our waistcoat is that unlike waistcoats worn as part of a three piece suit, we button the lowest button. Of course, the lowest button on a waistcoat of a three piece suit is not buttoned, out of deference to a difficulty once experienced by His late Majesty Kind Edward VII, of rather portly frame, who found it impossible to button up the lowest button. Since no-one could be better dressed than His Majesty, of course his courtiers began to leave that button undone, setting a fashion that endures to this day.

Since our waistcoat predates that modern custom, we of course do not button our lower buttons. We do not bow to the passing fashion fads of such recent provenance - His late Majesty reigned a mere century ago, and there is no guarantee such a whimsical trend will stand the test of time. Only the most portly barristers now would leave their lower button undone - really, My Lord? I was not aware - perhaps I could suggest a subscription to the “Y”?

In any event, those are our submissions on behalf of our client, My Lord, unless Your Lordship has are any questions. Contempt, My Lord? surely not…