Well, I’d be in good company! Seriously, that critique was spot-on and funny, Sport!
It is unlikely that a person of such taste and distinction would not have read it, but in the off chance…Twain’s essay on James Fenimore Cooper is a masterpiece, and the link reverently offered.
http://twain.lib.virginia.edu/projects/rissetto/offense.html
Enjoy, if you haven’t, enjoy again, if you have.
She’s not an intellectual. She comes across as a self-entitled twat.
Oh ho. Mr. Humblebragger, eh?
Some of us in the olden days considered ourselves blessed if we were even allowed in the same room with the pseudo-intellectuals… Who stole my stone wheel again?
We *dreamed *of having a room…
Every time I get ready to settle down and re-read it, somebody steps on a twig!
As Cat Whisperer pointed out, I was close, though. You know, Gaudere’s law gets everyone in the end.
No, yes, maybe. Clear enough?
The grunting and pointing would suggest to me you’re about to engage in projectile vomiting.
Which, in a sense, you already have. 
Thank you, sir.
Three pages, really? Maybe the OP is on to something here. Certainly, “Hey, go fuck yourself,” shouldn’t take this long to convey.
Not to be torturing me! I admit it! I am a verbose and pretentious person! I post here using big words and obscure Firesign Theatre quotes collected over a misspent life because I can and the kind and smart people here understand me and make the connections. Or because I can’t see their funny looks and rolled eyes. Whichever. But I can talk like myself here, which I cannot IRL because my friends are ignoramuses and I often speak haltingly, which wrecks the buildup or even the punchline and can really be a bother when I’m on the phone, but which doesn’t come across in writing.*
(racking sobs)
I [del]stand[/del] sit here a broken man, Penny. You have forced me to out myself and reveal my innermost secrets.** Are you satisfied? Does it make you happy to stab people in the heart with your sharp tongue and lightning wit? Jesus Christ demands that I forgive you, but how can I forgive a hurt like you delivered? And look at that! You have now made me reject God and I am doomed to an eternity in Hell.
You have destroyed me.
-
- And I can edit. ETA: You can’t beat being able to edit.
** - Okay, it’s no secret that my friends are ignoramuses. All you have to do is talk to them.
Well, there are quite a few dopers ( Anyone have a count?).
I could see a continuous wall of the pruned to non-verbosity (As requested by the Op) “F U” sentiment stretching three pages…
Darmok and Jilad at Tinagra.
From Twain to Picard… love it 
They should’ve made an episode with both of them!
Well, on this board we have to be indirect.
…
“Go pleasure yourself”, then?
Penny, Penny, Penny … yes, there are some verbose souls here, and some less so. Also, you’ll find a lot of oversensitive blowhards who can’t stand any criticism whatsoever. I find that to be infinitely more tiresome than the random grandiloquence. Since there’s no chance you’ll actually turn them down for the prom, (or stick their head in the toilet, if you were a guy), they can gang-threaten you with impunity from the internet version of the “nerd table”. Wouldn’t you have more fun participating in a thread where something is actually being discussed instead of setting your self up for as a target for verbal water balloons?
I like your moxie. It’s a devious sardonic kind of moxie.
Yeah Penny, SirGalahad and I are way too cool for the nerds at the SDMB.
Join us behind MPSIMS after school. We’ll be giving a few of these smart-talkin’ dweebs an atomic wedgie!
kickflips backwards and skates away