It is definitely manipulative for panhandlers to approach you & ask for money while you sitting down eating, in a drive through in your car, and on public transportation - i.e., anywhere where you can’t easily escape them (i.e., by walking away). These people intentionally do this so that they can “guilt” you into giving them money, since they know that you’re more or less stationary & it will be difficult for you to leave the situation.
Any restaurant that continuously allows panhandlers to bother the customers will probably soon find itself with less customers.
I’m surprised they let you fill up a milk jug, although I guess these days gas stations in most states don’t tend to have anyone working outside that can see. Back when both full and self service was common, I recall it was prohibited to fill any container except a proper gas can with gasoline, because of safety reasons. I assume the same rules are still in place, just hard to enforce since nobody’s outside to watch.
I give money to beggars in really poor countries, but not often in the US. (Sometimes I do here- I’m more likely to if I’ve just been drinking at the bar and am in a good mood, or whatever, or if I’m about to go into or come out of a store and have ‘money’ on my mind).
I have mainly women who are homeless near where I live. One time I was going back home from the store with bags and a woman approached me and asked for money, I said I don’t have any so she says - “Give me some of your food in the bags”, I said something like “I can’t” and left.
When I first moved to this area I gave some money, and one time I was walking back home at night when I hear someone shouting “sir sir, wait sir!” and I thought I forgot something on the bus so she was bringing it back to me so I stand and wait for her to catch up. She then starts some confusing, long and boring story about clearly wanting cash for the bus… So being tired from a long day I stop her and say “so how much money do you want/need?”, she asks for X and I say I will give you 1 dollar and another person will give you the rest… So I open my wallet and she grabs it with her hands and tries to pull out bills by force… So we are standing there fighting for my wallet… Eventually she realizes I am stronger and lets go… she got away with 1 or 2 dollars which I felt angry about, I just turned around and walked away… Ever since I have given nothing to noone apart from one time I bought a really bad smoothie and I gave it to a guy in the street, cause I was about to bin it anyway.